Meeting, falling in love, and staying together until the end of the rest of our lives is the love that each of us longs for.
However, fate is determined by fate, but love cannot be controlled by others.
Some people are lucky and can reach the end of the road happily after meeting, while some people can only accompany them for one journey when they meet. When they reach the station, they can only get off. When they reach the point, they can only stop. When the fate is over, they can only choose. Finish.
But after a relationship ends, can two people who have had an intimate relationship be friends again?
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Regarding this issue, some people say: There is only one kind of person who can be friends after separation. It is difficult for people who have never loved each other deeply and truly loved each other deeply to be friends again.
Indeed, it is difficult for people of the opposite sex to have pure friendship, let alone men and women who have loved each other before. No matter how long or short the time we spend with each other is, once they fall in love with each other, it will be difficult to remain friends calmly.
After all, we have had the most intimate relationship with each other and have been together day and night. In many cases, what you want from the other person is not just a friend.
Every move of the other party will be magnified in your eyes, and every word and deed of the other party will easily bring back all kinds of beautiful or sad memories in you.
In this way, if you continue to interact with each other, it will only make you sink deeper and deeper, making it difficult to let go.
The person who still wants to be friends with the other person after breaking up is probably the one who loves him the most, and hopes to continue to be good to him in the name of being a friend.
Because he still couldn’t let go and didn’t want to part ways, he chose to be friends and secretly love each other.
However, such a friendship cannot last long.
The biggest difference between love and friendship is that being a lover requires concentration, while being a friend requires open-mindedness.
If you feel that you have completely let go and the other person will not have any interference or influence on you, then you can try to be ordinary friends.
But if you don’t have this calmness and open-mindedness in front of the other person, then continuing to be friends will only increase your troubles.
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Secondly, whether you can be friends or not is not decided by one person, but depends on the attitudes of two people.
Maybe your original intention is simply to be friends with the other person, but the other person wants more responses from you. Since you have different definitions of the relationship, continuing to stay in contact may involve a lot of unnecessary trouble.
Generally, inappropriate ways of getting along between opposite-sex friends can easily lead to misunderstandings, especially between two people who have fallen in love.
Furthermore, if each of you already has your own significant other, when dealing with opposite-sex relationships, both parties should have a strong balance in mind to ensure that the current relationship is not affected.
Love requires two people to be happy, and friendship requires two people to maintain the same innocence towards each other.
If two people who have been in a relationship want to be friends, they must do their duty as a friend. Don’t contact each other frequently, don’t say ambiguous words, and don’t do things that couples do under the guise of being friends.
A true friend of the opposite sex must be one where both parties consciously and voluntarily maintain boundaries and have a clear understanding of each other at all times.
This rational sense of proportion is not only respect for both parties, but also respect for one’s lover.
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Can people of the opposite sex who have been lovers still be friends?
There is no unified standard answer to this question. The key depends on your own situation and how both parties choose.
Friends and lovers are different. Friends need to maintain a certain degree of control and cannot cross the line at any time.
Some people say they want to be friends, but in reality they don’t let go. Even if they become friends, they will feel depressed and tired during the process of getting along.
In a relationship, if you are not destined to stay together and are not willing to be friends, it is better to choose to bless each other. In this way, it is not only decent for the past years, but also responsible for the future life.
It is best for people who have loved to get along with each other calmly, and cannot just forget each other. This is the best choice from the standpoints of both parties.
After all, after so many years, it is like saying goodbye and wishing you well, which may be the best way to settle a past relationship.
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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From The Good Men Project on Medium
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Photo credit: Toa Heftiba on Unsplash
