Michael Burnstein is here to discover and tell his story, and support you on your journey toward the Conscious Masculine.
What is so special about the Conscious Masculine?
A few years ago, I associated Masculine as he is often portrayed in this culture. The macho athlete, tall, handsome, opening the door of his red sports car for his beautiful woman, a few hours after he had saved her from a ferocious monster of some sort. He didn’t talk about feelings, he was strong, he drank beer with his buddies at the pub, maybe he got in a fight. When I really got imaginative – I even noticed how Buildings seemed Masculine, or bridges, but that was about as far as I got. And putting the words conscious and masculine in the same sentence was the ultimate oxymoron…
Today, Conscious Masculinity is a big part of my life (after all, I call my self a conscious masculinity coach)…I associate this with words like: presence, direction, boundaries, authenticity, integrity, protection and emotionally connected/aware.
I am a Masculine male (there is a hint of feminine there too). Sometimes in my life I have swayed heavily into the “darker” aspects of masculinity – competitive, possessive, destructive, aggressive, overbearing, oppressive. Sometimes these traits have served me.
And, as I have become more aware, I have learned that these ways often did not work. For me, the most important step was to become conscious of my masculinity – literally be aware of it. Develop the parts of it that work for me, love all of it, and deal with the parts that are not working for me in any moment. This is a work in progress. I still fuck up – I call this learning. I don’t ever intend to stop exploring my masculinity.So how does this show up in my life? EVERYWHERE. it shows up in my relationships with my kids, work, my friends, strangers, the people I see every day at my local co-op. And yes it shows up (big time) in my relationship with my woman.
The place I believe my Conscious Masculine shines brightest is in love making with my woman. Here, my presence, ability to create a safe place, direction and awareness all shine. And then my understanding of what happens diminishes. It doesn’t matter. We start dancing in that place where she and I become blurred. Where Masculine and Feminine are lost, or perhaps are married into a sacred swirl that we call love.
In this sacred place – for me – becoming conscious of my masculine, has set a stage for the unexplainable. My experience was something like this:
“What happens if I really pay attention?..I mean REALLY. What happens if I really open my heart, if I truly trust, if I am stripped of everything that is NOT authentic? What happens if I drop my armor and create a safe place around her? What happens if I let go of all those ideas I have held around sex, love and relationship and just drop into this moment?……….. OH WOW, THAT HAPPENS!”
“THAT” doesn’t happen every time, sometimes there is a taste, sometimes there is a flood. “THAT” is different every time. The more I experience “THAT,” the less I understand or can explain what “THAT” is. It is certainly not me or because of me. And even though she has a great part in setting this stage too, it is not her either. “THAT” is something wonderful coming through us and is us at the same time.
As I explore, I am noticing that “THAT” is available in many places, perhaps everywhere, all the time.
I am not a Tantric Master, Guru or teacher. I have not spent years studying texts nor have I subscribed to a lineage of teaching. I am no more or less than the person next to me. I’m here to simply discover and tell my story, and support you on your journey.