Depending on Community, Not Government

There has been flooding in parts of the United States. I used to live near some of those areas, so I was calling friends to make sure they were OK. One of my neighbors was also affected.

He and his family moved here when he was 9, 20 years ago. In many ways, we are now family.

And so today I saw his emotional fragility, his vulnerability. He was open and honest with me because he needed a safe space and I could provide that for him.

He had friends and family in Tennessee. I had friends in North Carolina. We both knew people in Florida.

“FEMA’s not doing a g*d d*mned thing,” he said.

“No, they don’t seem to be,” I said.

“I mean, Trump is a douche, but at least I’ve seen him go down there,” my friend said. “And Elon Musk is trying to connect through Starlink. And my friend and I have donated through Samaritan’s Purse.”

“I did too,” I said. “I remember they are located in Boone, so they are right there. And I was reading that Dolly Parton and some of the other local people have been donating water and other supplies.”

My friend is a Muslim, and a devout one, but he doesn’t care how help gets to people. He wants them to get help.

We talked about Bitcoin and whether that could help. We also discussed AI. The conversation was wide ranging but it seemed to help him. He calmed down the more we talked.

His mother was traveling as was much of his family so he felt unmoored.

However, this young man has been helping my mother with her groceries for years now, and he considers Mom to be like a grandmother to him and me to be like an elder sistar or aunt. So we can give him comfort.

“So, yea, Biden’s been useless,” he said. “I guess sometimes a douche is more useful. But really it comes down to real people, doesn’t it, not government agencies?”

“I’m frankly stunned they are not all swarming down there like flies, using this to get votes in an election year,” I said.

I imagined what Bill Clinton might have done.

Instead, I turned on the news and never saw Joe Biden or Kamala Harris. However, I did see Donald Trump standing there with Governor Kemp in Goergia. I did see Ron DeSantis tell the world Florida did not need federal help so he wanted those agencies to work with other states that had greater needs.

Governors — on both sides of the aisle — are coordinating their efforts despite apparent misfires by federal agencies.

After we talked, he seemed to feel better. I gave him a hug and told him I’d talk to him whenever he needed.

He and his family have done a lot for our family, as have several other neighbors and local friends. I feel very much a part of a community, a village.

While these particular friends are Muslim, they have another friend who is Carholic who sometimes comes over to help out the elderly people in our area. I have Mexican friends and white friends and black friends, all who are part of the community.

His family, however, have been part of our lives for 20 years. That makes a huge difference. And for the last few years, every month he takes Mom shopping.

He is serving us, but in the process, it’s also helping him.

He feels connected. He has roots. We find ways to take care of him too, and to care for his mother, his sister, his handicapped cousin.

Our local community cares and so we are more resilient than those who rely mainly on the government. Because when push comes to shove, government agencies can let you down, but your neighbors know who you are. And if they are from traditional communities — whether grown in Appalachia or India, or Mexico — these are people who understand the importance of villages and neighborhoods.

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This post was previously published on MEDIUM.COM.

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