People have been telling me I’m a positive person a lot lately. I was diagnosed with metastatic brain, lung, and liver cancer last April. The doctors gave me 6 months to live, but I’m still here and enjoying my life as much as I can. There are things I can no longer do, but I do what I can. My oncologist told me on my last visit that we are charting new waters — she is baffled that I’m still functional.
I think the reason I’m still doing as well as I am has a lot to do with my attitude. I think I do have a positive attitude, and this is helping me.
But what does it mean to have a positive attitude?
Does this mean you believe you’ll win the lottery? Or think that cute person to fall in love with you through the mystical power of your brain waves?
Let’s get real. A positive attitude is not a substitute for doing the work.
Think of the work as the healthy components in a meal. Think of the positive attitude as the seasoning. It’s what makes the food taste good and often adds nutritional components that make it healthier.
Earlier today I had a conversation with a friend who does NOT have a positive attitude. He sorta reminds me of Eeyore, actually. He is often depressed. But he is one of my best friends despite this because he is a very caring, loyal friend and when he’s not depressed he’s really funny.
Today he was down because he was facing a problem that seemed insurmountable to him.
“Have you tried this?” I asked.
“No, that won’t work,” he said, and pointed out why. That last bit is really important, since you can’t solve a problem if you don’t know why there IS a problem.
“How about this?” I asked.
We went at this for several rounds. Most people, I think, would have given up. My friend certainly wanted to long before I did. But I persevered, because I care about my friend and wanted to help him.
Finally I offered up a solution that he actually thought could work. It was justa random idea but instead of dismissing it, I shared and it turned out to solve the problem for him.
My lesson from this — I had a positive attitude. What that meant — I believed I could find the solution and I wouldn’t give up until I did.
Most of the time, when I remember how I’ve solved problems in the past — this is the real key.
Life is hard. When you have a negative attitude, you make it even harder.
A positive attitude will not solve your problems. But by giving you the confidence to persevere and to think creatively, it will make it easier to find solutions.
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This post was previously published on a Few Words.
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