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Jon Snow got into his first big fight with another dog yesterday. Actually, it wasn’t much of a fight. He tried to play with another dog that exhibits “resource guarding”, a problem characterized by aggression whenever someone tries to touch their ball, food, or things.
When Jon went to join in the fun of chasing the ball, the dog attacked him, tearing his right ear in multiple places. I heard a sharp scream from my dog, who scurried away in pain, piercing my soul with cries. The dude with the dog didn’t even turn around to see about my pup. That was the bite that sunk its teeth into me.
Jon Snow ran to me, and I cradled him, but he was inconsolable. My soul bled powerlessness. I was struck by the irony: the night before I had an inconsolable woman in my car, crying because her dude yelled at her. Now I have an inconsolable puppy in my arms, only instead of “why did he yell at me?” all I could hear was “Why did he bite me?” This theme keeps popping up: men hurting other living things by not containing their anger.
Every time I run across an aggressive dog at the park, the owner is a man. I’ve seen other dudes watch their dogs aggress other pups in clear submissive mode, and walk away like nothing happened. I never see women do that.
The thought arises that a lot of men use their dogs to express their disowned aggression or need for dominance. This is a cultural problem. Jon Snow shivered & cried in my arms for a while before I addressed the other owner.
Aggressive dogs should not be unleashed in a dog park full of playful dogs and puppies. The guy was in denial (“my dog’s not aggressive”) but what set me on fire was his attitude: apathetic and smiling while telling me, “hey man, these things happen.” My puppy is bleeding and this guy is smiling because his dog “won”. I was not diplomatic about it.
The wild dog in me began foaming at the mouth.
I’ve always had a thing about bullies, whether they’re school kids, faux-presidents, or guys who bring problem dogs to the dog park. The guy was big. He looked like a mountain, but anger has the effect of diminishing everything it sees. As my anger grew to rage, this mountain looked more like a valley I couldn’t wait to stomp through. All I wanted to do was chop that tree down. It was as if the dude’s aggression seeped into his dog which then seeped into me.
Anger has a way of separating us from our humanity.
The more anger, the more severing; the more severing, the more bleeding; the more bleeding, the less life. Insanity becomes the new reality. In that moment of insanity, I forgot I was with my friend, Lanis. She has the softest heart, which expresses thru an angelic voice. She wrapped her wings around me and began talking. “Greg, come on.” I’d forgotten I was “Greg”, but she reminded me I’m connected to everything.
Today I am convinced the Feminine is Divine Medicine that keeps the immature masculine from eating itself as it descends into the kingdom of wild dogs.
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