Domestic Violence (DV) is a heinous crime affecting all genders, religions, skin color, origin, and economic income. Contrary to popular belief, DV victims are not always females on the receiving end, often it is also against men, and in LGTBQ+ relationships, it becomes more complex.
According to the streaming analytics platform “Stream Charts,” people watched the Johnny Depp vs. Amber Heard defamation trial for almost 84 million Hours. On the day of the verdict, 3.5 million viewers tuned in life or streamed for the ruling. In a turn of events, it became clear that this was not about who says what about the other, but a Domestic Violence (DV) case.
Whatever the trial result, who you support, or if there’s going to be an appeal, one thing has emerged from this case; women can also be the abuser and men the victim.
However, how does Domestic Violence affect the LGBTQ+ community? What happens in a DV same-sex relationship? Who is the abuser, and who is the victim?
Please consider, after reading the article and learning some shocking DV statistics, bookmarking it, or sharing it with someone in need of help.
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It is not only a numbers game
The National Domestic Violence Hotline defines Domestic Violence or Intimate Partner Violence (IPV) as a series of behaviors to harm and arouse fear, forcing one person to behave or do what they do not want. These behaviors include but are not limited to the use of physical and sexual violence, threats, and emotional or economic abuse. Many of these behaviors may co-occur in an intimate relationship.
Domestic Violence is a major issue worldwide, and according to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence, nearly 20 people per minute suffer physical abuse in the United States (over 10 million women and men each year) where:
- 1 in 4 women and 1 in 9 men experience severe intimate partner physical violence, causing injuries, fearfulness, depression, suicidal behaviors, and post-traumatic stress disorder.
- 1 in 3 women and 1 in 4 men have experienced physical violence from their partner (slapping, shoving, pushing). 19% of domestic violence involves a weapon that increases the risk of homicide by 500%.
- 1 in 7 women and 1 in 25 men suffered injuries from an intimate partner. Also, intimate partner violence accounts for 15% of all violent crimes.
- 1 in 10 women has been raped by an intimate partner (no data available for male victims).
- 1 in 7 women and 1 in 18 men felt afraid of an intimate partner stalking them during their lifetime.
- Half of the male victims (49%) fail to tell anyone they are a victim of domestic abuse and are two and a half times less likely to tell anyone than female victims (19%).
- 11% of male victims have considered taking their life due to partner abuse. This number increased during the pandemic.
- On average, 72 women and 12 men per year are killed by a partner or ex-partner.
Yet, only 34% of these cases receive medical care for their injuries, and most domestic violence cases go unreported.
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But what about the LGBTQ+
These alarming statistics reflect only numbers of female or male domestic violence victims, but we also have to consider those directly affecting the LGBTQ+ community.
The CDC’s National Center for Injury Prevention and Control Division of Violence Prevention presented the 2010 National Intimate Partner and Sexual Violence Survey for LGB people, where they mentioned:
- Compared to 35% of straight women, 44% of lesbians, and 61% of bisexual women experience rape, physical violence, or stalking by an intimate partner.
- Compared to 29% of straight men, 26% of gay men, and 37% of bisexual men experience rape, physical violence, or stalking by an intimate partner.
- 46% of bisexual women have been raped, compared to 17% straight women and 13% of lesbians. In these cases, in 22% of bisexual women, the aggressor was an intimate partner.
- 21% of straight men experienced domestic violence, compared to 40% of gay men and 47% of bisexual men.
Within the LGBTQ+ community, transgender people and bisexual women face the most alarming rates of sexual violence. Among both of these populations, sexual violence begins early, often during childhood.
The 2015 U.S. Transgender Survey shows that 47% of transgender people are sexually assaulted at some point in their lifetime. Furthermore, among transgender respondents of the survey, 65% of American Indian, 59% of multiracial, 58% of Middle Eastern, and 53% of Black, admitted being sexually assaulted in their lifetime.
When Intimate Partner Violence occurs in adolescence, it is called teen dating violence (TDV). In most cases (11 million teen women and 5 million teen men) who reported sexual violence, physical violence, or stalking by an intimate partner said they experienced these forms of violence for the first time before age 18. Moreover, 48% of bisexual rape survivor women reported it was between 11 and 17 years old.
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Taking LGBTQ+ Domestic Violence out of the closet
Although every domestic violence case should end, according to the CDC, LGBTQ+ people experience sexual violence at higher rates than straight people.
This means 1 in 3 LGBTQ+ people experienced DV from a family member, partner, or ex-partner, but they don’t find support services that meet their specific needs.
Here are some unique differences for LGBTQ+ people:
Perpetrators use someone’s intersex status, sexuality, gender, or HIV status against their victims, threatening to ‘out’ them to their family, friends, or workplace.
Survivors report their abuser denied access to medications and healthcare or pressured them to conform to sex or gender “norms.”
There is a lack of mainstream services for LGBTQ+ people worldwide and a lack of understanding and/or discrimination by police and service providers.
Survivors must speak up without fearing being judged, disbelief, or ridiculed. Moreover, we require changes in education, laws, and community efforts to address LGBTQ+ violence and ensure they receive adequate support.
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Where to seek help
Worldwide, LGBTQ+ people face widespread discrimination and exclusion at school, work, and health care services. Many countries have laws criminalizing the LGBTQ+ even with the death penalty, denying them access to legal representation, and forcing intersex persons to undergo medical interventions, violating their human rights.
Still, there is hope. Other nations are working on helping victims of domestic violence. If you seek help or want to report domestic or another kind of violence, here are some public or private organizations to help.
United States
If you are in immediate danger, call 911. To find help, click on your state on this map to see who serves your local area, or call one of the national hotlines:
Domestic Violence Hotline 1–800–799-SAFE (7233)
Sexual Assault Hotline 1–800–656-HOPE (4673)
Teen Dating Abuse Helpline 1–866–331–9474
Victim Hotline 1–855–4-Victim (855–484–2846)
Love is Respect National Teen Dating Abuse Helpline, 1–866–331–9474
Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network (RAINN) National Sexual Assault Hotline external, Call 800–656-HOPE (4673) to access a trained staff member from a sexual assault service provider in your area
National Resource Center on Domestic Violence
Or check the following link for further information: “DOJ Help by State Map”
The Trevor Project External — A national organization focused on crisis and suicide prevention among LGBTQ+ youth.
Australia
For an emergency, always call Triple Zero (000). If it’s not urgent, call the Police Assistance Line on 131 444. You can also make an anonymous call without giving your name by calling Crime Stoppers on 1800 333 000. More information here about Domestic Family Violence.
Domestic Violence Liaison Officers DV line (24 hours) 1800 65 64 63
To seek help from a specially trained officer to address LGBTQ+ issues, click here for Gay and Lesbian Liaison Officers.
Canada
If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, call 9–1–1, or contact your local police emergency number. If you are afraid for your safety, you may be able to get a peace bond or a non-criminal protection order to keep the abuser away from you.
For more information, or if the situation isn’t dangerous right now, call a health center, victim services, community organization, shelter, or the local police and tell them about the abuse at intimate partner violence and abuse, or call:
Royal Canadian Mounted Police RCMP
73 Leikin Drive, Ottawa ON K1A 0R2
Phone 613–993–7267, TTY: 613–825–1391, Fax: 613–993–0260
United Kingdom
Domestic abuse or domestic violence is a crime that should be reported to the police. Call 999 if it’s an emergency or immediate danger. Contact your local neighborhood policing team if it’s not an emergency.
Free phone National Domestic Abuse Helpline, 0808 200 0247
Galop (for lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender people) 0800 999 5428
Live Fear Free helpline (Wales), 0808 80 10 800
Men’s Advice Line, 0808 801 0327
Scottish Women’s Aid, 0131 226 6606
Women’s Aid Federation (Ireland), 0800 917 1414
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Take away
How can we all help to eradicate Domestic Violence?
DV can be eradicated worldwide by helping in organizations, in education, supporting survivors without judgment, and encouraging them to report the abuse or share this information.
Since our politicians are more interested in the economy and creating jobs than people’s safety and welfare, maybe let them know these facts:
Victims of intimate partner violence lose 8.0 million days of paid work annually. The cost of domestic violence exceeds $8.3 billion per year. Between 21 and 60% of victims of these crimes lost their jobs due to reasons stemming from the abuse. Additionally, between 2003 and 2008, 142 women died in their workplace at the hands of their abuser.
Maybe this will switch their focus. If not, contact your state representative and ask them to make some changes or register to vote and elect someone who listens to your needs, not what the Big Pharma or the NRA wants.
Cover your tracks
If you seek information or help on family violence, remember others with access to your computer may “track” your browsing history. Be sure to erase the history or use an Incognito Window, do a Web search on how to “cover your tracks”, or find a computer your abuser won’t check, such as one at a public library, cyber cafe, or women’s shelter.
For more information about cyber security go to Comparitech
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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Photo credit: Marco Bianchetti at Unsplash
