Relationships are no doubt, the most important aspect of one’s life. So much so, that they can either make you the best version of yourself or destroy you to no return — yeah that bad.
I have seen people suffering in the name of relationship because they ignored the signs and thought the other person would eventually change — they loved the other person or so they claimed.
But I would be lying if I don’t say, I haven’t seen flourishing and amazing relationships which we all want and wish for — the kind where there is understanding, respect, loyalty, trust, care and most of all love.
What do they share in common? No, nothing too fancy. Just little but important aspects which make up for a lot in the long run.
Everyone talks about red flags in a relationship, what should we avoid in the person — basically looking out for all the negatives out for in a person.
But if we just change our perspective and try to look for the green flags — the positive aspects, trust me things would be lot easier and helpful.
We’re all flawed and as hard it might sound, our partner isn’t going to be all Mr/Ms Perfect. But if they have the following qualities, life’s gonna be a lot better.
These 9 green flags will help you look for the right person and not regret it in the future.
…
#1 Your partner understands that the relationship is just a part of your life, ‘not your whole life’.
You’re not your relationship. You’re an individual personality who’s got a life apart from the relationship. Never confuse the two.
Space — personal space is so important while being in a relationship. Don’t make your whole life revolve around one person and cut off from the outside world. You should feel free in a relationship, not suffocated.
A healthy sign in a relationship is when your partner understands and supports your other life commitments, respects your relationship with others, and gives you space and time without making you feel guilty.
…
#2 You enjoy ‘comfortable silence’ with them.
You don’t always have to talk or do something. Try being quiet and savor the silence.
Silence in a healthy relationship wouldn’t make you awkward or weird. It’s going to be the most comfortable and natural thing with the right person. No rush, just a sense of calmness and safety.
…
#3 You don’t need to worry about ‘double texting’ or timing your replies.
In the digital age, the fear of being judged has increased immensely. Not only are we afraid of being judged for our looks, movements, personality but also for texting.
Yes, you know what I’m talking about.
‘What if I seem too eager for replying fast?’
‘Oh I double texted, they must think I’m too desperate!’
‘I’m going to reply after an hour, they replied late as well!’
‘God, I made an error in this text. They must think I’m an idiot.’
Shhh! Take a breath!
You don’t have to feel all of these just while texting someone. If you still are very conscious of yourself while texting your partner, you need to ask yourself if you’re really yourself & comfortable with them?
The right person wouldn’t make you feel stupid for texting too often & fast, any typing error or anything of that sort. You’ll be comfortable around them being YOU.
…
#4 Your partner is there for you, ‘unconditionally’, on your good and bad days.
What’s a relationship if you’re only together in good times and avoid each other when things go bad?
That’s right, it’s a bad relationship.
A right partner wouldn’t leave your side in celebrations but especially in times when things are bad for you. They would always be right behind you whenever you need them.
Relationships aren’t always roses and you are going to experience those thrones too, but if you both are fighting against the problem together, you’ll come out as a winner.
…
#5 They ‘don’t get jealous or insecure’ when you hang out with other people.
Like I mentioned before, you have a life apart from your relationship. You are ought to meet people and that shouldn’t in any way make your partner insecure.
If your partner is constantly against you hanging out with other people and overreacts each time. Then darling, it’s a sign to let go.
At the end, it all comes down to trust — one of the basic foundation of any relationship. Your partner needs to trust you and yes, “It’s not you, it’s them I don’t trust” isn’t always an excuse.
…
#6 They ‘aren’t afraid to disagree with you’, but they still respect your opinion.
Arguments and disagreements are a part of every relationship. But that doesn’t mean you’ve to always avoid them, in fact they’re an initial part of a healthy relationship.
There shouldn’t be a situation where either of you don’t keep your opinion forward just to avoid conflicts or because you’re scared of the way other person would respond or react.
It’s important to listen and respect each other’s opinion even when you don’t share the same point of view. Such space in a relationship helps it prosperous and leads to more understanding.
…
7. They ‘communicate openly and honestly’ every time something goes wrong, instead of being passive-aggressive.
Open and honest communication is key to maintaining healthy relationships, whether it’s with a romantic partner, family member, friend, or colleague.
When something goes wrong, it’s important to address the issue openly and directly rather than resorting to passive-aggressive behavior, which can often make the situation worse.
By communicating openly and honestly, you can avoid misunderstandings, build trust, and work together to find solutions to problems.
It’s also important that you approach these conversations with a willingness to listen and understand the other person’s perspective, as well as a commitment to finding a mutually acceptable resolution.
Try to express yourself calmly and clearly, and encourage the other person to do the same. If emotions run high, take a break and come back to the conversation when you’re both feeling more level-headed.
This can help you strengthen your relationships and build a foundation of trust and respect.
…
#8 You like the person you are ‘when you are with them’.
When you’re with someone who brings out the best in you, you feel more confident, happy, and fulfilled. You may find that you’re more willing to take risks, try new things, and pursue your passions.
You may also find that you’re more compassionate, patient, and understanding with others, as a result of the positive energy that your relationship brings.
It’s important to note that being with someone who brings out the best in you doesn’t mean that you have to change who you are or compromise your values. Rather, it means that you’re in a relationship where you feel supported and encouraged to be your authentic self.
If you find that you don’t like the person you are when you’re with someone, it may be a sign that the relationship is not healthy.
In this case, it’s important to take a step back and assess whether the relationship is worth continuing, or if it’s time to move on and focus on relationships that bring out the best in you.
…
#9 They ‘celebrate your small wins and big achievements’ instead of being dismissive or pulling you down.
In a healthy relationship, your partner should be your biggest cheerleader, offering support and encouragement when you need it most.
They should be genuinely happy for your success, and willing to celebrate with you, no matter how small the achievement may seem.
Being with someone who celebrates your wins and supports you through your struggles is a key ingredient of a healthy and positive relationship.
When you have someone in your life who genuinely celebrates your small wins and big achievements, it can give you a sense of validation and encouragement that motivates you to continue to pursue your goals.
On the other hand, if you’re with someone who is dismissive or pulls you down when you achieve something, it can be very discouraging and can damage your self-esteem.
This type of behavior can be a sign of insecurity or jealousy, and it’s important to talk to them about how their behavior is affecting you.
Be clear about what you need from them in terms of support and encouragement, and listen to their perspective as well.
If they are willing to work on their behavior and be more supportive, it can be a sign that the relationship is worth continuing.
However, if they are unwilling to change or make an effort to support you, it may be a sign that the relationship is not healthy and it’s time to consider moving on.
…
In conclusion, identifying green flags in a relationship can be just as important as recognizing red flags. While red flags are warning signs of potentially toxic or unhealthy behavior, green flags are positive indicators that the relationship is healthy and positive.
Paying attention to these green flags, can build strong and fulfilling relationships that bring out the best in you and your partner.
It’s important to remember that relationships take work, and both partners must be committed to making the relationship a priority and working through any challenges that may arise.
I hope this article was of some help and remember by being mindful of the green flags, and addressing any red flags that may emerge, you can build a relationship that is supportive, loving, and fulfilling for both partners.
—
This post was previously published on medium.com.
***
From The Good Men Project on Medium
 |
 |
 |
 |
***
Join The Good Men Project as a Premium Member today.
All Premium Members get to view The Good Men Project with NO ADS.
A $50 annual membership gives you an all access pass. You can be a part of every call, group, class and community.
A $25 annual membership gives you access to one class, one Social Interest group and our online communities.
A $12 annual membership gives you access to our Friday calls with the publisher, our online community.
Register New Account
Need more info? A complete list of benefits is here.
—–
Photo credit: Priscilla Du Preez on Unsplash
