You’ve seen the viral photos of “real men” in their underwear. Tony Posnanski thinks defining any man as “real” does more harm than good.
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Last year The Sun in the UK did a project. They took four men and put them in underwear ads. They put them in poses as models and athletes and kept the pictures untouched. They called it the “real man” project.
I hate the term “real” in front of any human being. It dehumanizes a class of people while trying to bring another class up.
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It resurfaced this year on Reddit. Like anything that gets popular on Reddit, everyone picks up the story. Everyone started to cover the story with the “real men” tag on it.
I hate the term “real men”.
I hate the term “real” in front of any human being. It dehumanizes a class of people while trying to bring another class up. I remember when the whole “real women have curves” quote came out. I did not understand it. I did not understand why saying the way someone looks makes him or her real or fake. Why would you say “fat shaming” in one breath and “anorexic models” in the next? So someone who is obese is not real? So someone who works out and takes care of their body is not real?
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In fact, I argued that real women have heartbeats. That is what it takes to be a real woman.
Not your size or putting down a more fit/unfit woman. That has nothing to do with “real”.
Now it is back to guys. This ad campaign was supposed to help men with body image.
So here is an opinion from a guy who has always had body image issues.
How is this supposed to help?
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As a guy, this campaign makes no sense. They chose four real men who are fit. One man looks like a lumberjack. One man looks like he goes to the gym and the other two look like they run in marathons. In fact, the pictures side by side do not look that much different. It is not like a major shock. Less touch ups and less abs. Less body hair and a little more skin.
I will never look like a professional model or athlete but I also know that they are just as real as every other human being.
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Yes, these are real men.
So are the four models.
One of the men modeling is Cristiano Ronaldo. He is a professional soccer player. He also paid for a 10 month old’s brain operation that cost over $60,000. One of the men modeling is David Beckham who does kind things as well. Because these men have abs and play professional sports does not make them any less “real”.
Real men have working hearts. It has nothing to do with the way you look. My body image issues happened because so many people told me that I was fat, ugly and worthless. Guess what, I believed it for a long time. No one told me any different. I refuse to let my children feel that way. Not if I can help it. I also am a food addict. I refuse to put down other people to make myself feel better. I do not think this type of project would help me feel better about myself.
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I will never look like a professional model or athlete but I also know that they are just as real as every other human being. Should companies use untouched and unphotoshopped pictures? Of course. Will they? Probably not.
But it is semantics.
Four men with less than “model” bodies imitated poses of four men who model and play professional sports. They looked good doing it. In fact, I would actually say on some of them they look better than the people they are imitating.
But that has nothing to do with being real.
Real men…real women have working hearts.
And if you ever want to see one, look in the mirror.
That will be the best example.
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Originally Published: The Anti-Jared.com
Photo: David Goehring/Flickr
A really interestin perspective Tony, I remember seeing the original article in The Sun when it first came out and I reached a similar conclusion myself. The validity of the article would’ve been better if instead of messers Ronaldo and Beckham, they had chosen a 40 year old dad, a 20-something student or maybe a normal, ordinary decent bloke. They for me are far more real as we see that sort of person every day. Speaking as a naturist, acceptance of body image is something that I have an intimate knowledge of. Encouraging men and women to be comfortable with… Read more »
We love you Tony!
Tony, thanks for your perspective. I agree that “real” is a two edged sword and can be hurtful, suggesting some of us are more “real” and others of us are less “real.” I’ve dedicated my life to helping all men and the families who love them to live well. I’ll check out your work. You can see mine here. http://www.MenAlive.com and my writing here on Good Men.