How Did My Life Change When I Started Comparing Myself to Myself?

The toxic act one does to himself is comparing oneself with others.

Humans have this weird habit of comparing, and it has to be accepted that it is inevitable. But it is important to overcome this habit of comparison to live a life of fulfillment and contentment.

Today is my birthday, and I remember how I was on my last birthday: sad and depressed, comparing myself with friends who had become successful, financially independent, and, of course, happy.

But fast forward one year, and I am happy and proud of who I am, feeling happy and exuberant.

And I want to share this story with the world so that at least it could inspire one person who is struggling with their life and their unfulfilled desires.

Let’s dive in.

Two years ago, I was not the same person as I am now. I was so naive, stupid, and dumb that life didn’t seem to be looking clear for me.

I always wondered about the people who studied with me and their prosperous and wonderful careers. I never thought about my life and career and just kept wondering and worrying.

I was not happy at all, and that was one big mistake that I made.

Happiness is a decision, and the harsh truth is that any external factor should not affect it.

I was unhappy comparing my friend’s life with my own, which was an imbecile act that no one must do.

Then there was a time I was sitting jobless, worrying about my career and life, and comparing myself with others.

I compulsively took the decision to be happy, and I started to think a lot, which I had never done before, and I regretted not doing that. That was the time I did a deep retrospection, which made some sense.

I was never compassionate with myself when I always compared myself with others, and I was always hard on myself, which made me blind, and I never realized who I am or what I was capable of.

My past reminded me that at each stage of my life, life pushed me to learn and know something, and you know it connected with the present.

The truth is that every incident happens to us for some reason, and the most important thing is that many people never identify this.

Past life would have many horrible and disgusting incidents, which have a lot of connection with our present that we never realize.

We always worry and lament about the bad incidents that happen to us, but we never think about why they happened to us.

Connect the dots between your past incidents, which definitely have something to offer you, and trust me, you will definitely find out why they happened to you.

Our past incidents are the best teachers; they help us grow and enhance ourselves, and many people never do this.

The problem is that we are always so busy comparing ourselves to others that we forget what has happened to us. We never think about each other’s life journeys, and it’s not the same.

People always try to forget about their past, but the truth is that one who forgets his past is a fool.

Everybody is unique, and everybody’s journeys are unique too.

We never think about the path and process, and we blindly look at the results, which is completely the wrong perception people are adopting, which makes them depressed.

Always remember that every horrible incident becomes an experience when we give meaning to that incident. If we don’t give a meaning, it remains an incident, not an experience.

…

What really happened when I started comparing myself to myself?

We all strive for growth and happiness.

Self-improvement is a slow process, and it doesn’t happen if you don’t compare yourself on a regular basis.

If you are the same person from now to a year later, then it’s obvious that you are not growing, and it’s essential that one compare his old self with his new self to know his growth.

Progress on each day is the real growth, and for that, one must realize his potential and worth.

I still remember feeling worthless and incapable when I was sitting jobless and not able to get a job. Then I realized that being jobless doesn’t determine my worth, and I accepted that things take time.

I have seen many hellish and hectic situations in my past that I crossed very easily with courage and determination, and when I turn back, I am astonished at how I did that. And that really happened when I started looking at my past with intentions to grow and progress.

Life lesson: Comparing oneself with others makes one rush in their life, and the truth is that it requires slowing down to notice the minute changes that happen in one’s life, which helps us strive towards growth and happiness.

So when I started living slowly and intentionally with purpose, I started growing, and I am happier than ever before.

Comparing myself to myself makes me better every day, pushing me to do things that make me grow personally, professionally, and financially.

If you feel your life is a mess with unfulfilled desires and dreams, start focusing on yourself rather than comparing your life with others.

Introspect yourself.

Every human in this world has faced all sorts of dangers and challenges; that’s what makes them strong and courageous.

With deep thinking and introspection, you can figure out the reason for what’s happening to you and why, and trust me, your life will change.

Always be proud of who you are. Don’t be hard on yourself for seeing your messed-up life; being compassionate and loving to yourself is the only way to change yourself, which will gradually change your life.

Remember, your past is the reason for what and who you are in the present. There is a reason for what you are going through right now and what you have already gone through.

Life always has this weird habit of teaching us and making us wise through harsh and hectic situations. Identify it, make your life meaningful, and be a person of wisdom.

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This post was previously published on medium.com.

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From The Good Men Project on Medium

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