The Answer
Not only can the answer be found in a previous article of mine (the first article listed below), but the answer is found inside of everyone’s heart.
That is, I cut the string. Where she floats or where that “business deal” drifts to, is where it goes. And it’s none of my concern or care in the world.
Ask Yourself
- Do you want to always be unsure about their heart?
That’s really the only question.
And my answer is “no”. If I think she might be leaning away, even .01%, please, help yourself to freedom. I’ll even help you. Bye.
You Deserve More
You deserve to have your heart complete. Just like them. It’s easy.
Take me, for example:
If someone was unsure if they liked after a couple strict exclusive months, then I’m probably done.
- If she has the attention span of puppy, I can’t work with that
- If she uses herself for sales, I can’t work with that — because I don’t know when she is being real and when she is flirting. So, I take that as unfaithfulness. Too easy
- If she can’t do just 2 months of exclusivity, then she can’t commit to marriage and a family, eventually, either
What You Need
You need organic. An organic relationship where she automatically wants just you — time with you, interaction, etc. That means she likes you for you and all of you.
Only 1 Thing Left
The only thing left is waking up and making the choice everyday. Even when the hurricanes hit. We will be sick, me and her. One or both of us might lose a job or desire new line of work. One of us might come down with a tough ailment, which deteriorates us in years. We might have kids that come along. And a bunch of other things as we age.
I would love to grow old with 1 woman. 60 years of marriage/friendship sounds like a relief from fear of heartbreak.
We Will Be Distracted
Of course I’m not Matthew David McConaughey. Never will be. If she gets thrown off track when he walks in the room, I guess she won’t notice me leaving. Men can be thrown off too, by Pocahontas, Elisabeth Elliot, and other examples.
But, I will not bat an eye lash after I have my decision. Because I want the 60 years! I’m not 20 years old. I understand that there are women in every country, mainly India, that I would love to meet. But! All doors are cemented, all bridges burned, all ships burned, and the ring means I die for you. Anything less and I’m evidently a POS who gets blown around by any gust of wind or perfume. Or other things that gets guys attention…
I expect the same. I don’t care if Matthew walks in the room. There’s no excuse. That answer should have answered long before you thought you could be in a relationship.
Seriously, by month 2 if you still don’t really know, just tell me and leave. I know there are guys who could just walk up and you say “yes”. Let’s be real, if Matthew did…
I know that trust builds over time with women, but let me just nail that coffin. That will come anyways by you being BEST friends with me. I’m not watching you test other waters. Ha-ha! That’s for shmucks. I don’t want you trusting other men. They WILL lead you away and you will follow (fee free to disagree, I guess we’ll find out).
We can be friends. You can be just friends with other guys and the one you magnetize to first is your choice. Yes, all of us guys have different things to offer, but we are all here for 1 reason. You can only have 1 of us.
If you are friends with Superman, Aquaman, and Iron Man you will be attracted to different traits equally and never just make a freaking choice. You can’t be legitimate friends with real men while dating. We will always try to win you.
Except me. If I’m #2 now, I’ll be #2 later, too.
By magnetize, I mean naturally with her heart, not with men who are womanizers. If you get catch with a womanizer, I don’t want you. You see, I’m 33, I can tell one of those homewreckers in a second. If you can’t, then you won’t later either. I think you did know, but you love red flags. And that will eventually end us. I need to trust that you are not weird. No man who has a healthy brain doesn’t think like me. I need to trust that if I’m in Afghanistan you are not saying “hello” to men.
Unless you are immature. If a man says “hi” and you smile or respond, he better be a salesman selling something. Or I’ll let you and him give it a shot.
I don’t want someone who gives way to potential division or doesn’t even see it coming. I need to know your heart. And by giving you freedom, I get to see that. If you come back, that’s togetherness. But, that doesn’t mean saying hello to every guy along the way. That’s a puppy. Are you going to pee on the sidewalk next, too?
I handle rejection great!
Until I propose, she’s not mine. And if she’s not mine, she has NONE of my validation. She has not earned it. I tie my validation to a wife. Nothing less. Anything less is a girl.
I go after huntresses. Women who know that every decision is permanent and creates dozens of ripple effects to all those around her. Huntresses cannot be tempted away, when it seems like she is “tempted away”, she is actually attacking. Don’t confuse the two.
Until we are engaged, go, do whatever you want. I won’t be here when you get back. Promise. And I don’t give 2nd chances. Once I’m picked second, I’ll find someone who picks me first.
As Dr. Santino says in the TV Show Necessary Roughness, “Bye-bye now”.
I know that if a woman is attracted to me, she will emanate the definition of the word “attracted” by the dictionary. From there, it’s a dance. I move, she responds; I move, she responds. If she stops responding, that’s her answer and I’ll give her “space” by leaving her alone and if she comes back, great! If she does come back, but after having even so as much as had 1 date with another (including a “lunch” with a guy friend, that was a date for him, guarantee it)— bye-bye. Over my dead body.
See, my ways are magic. I never get caught in a 10-year relationship with someone who’s inconsistent and will shatter my world. The moment she stops dancing, I’m leaving the dance hall and saving my life.
Let’s go on a journey to the heart of God together. Or not. I don’t care. Just pick one and live with it with all you got! Commit to it.
—
This post was previously published on Medium.
***
You Might Also Like These From The Good Men Project
Compliments Men Want to Hear More Often | Relationships Aren’t Easy, But They’re Worth It | The One Thing Men Want More Than Sex | ..A Man’s Kiss Tells You Everything |
Join The Good Men Project as a Premium Member today.
All Premium Members get to view The Good Men Project with NO ADS.
A $50 annual membership gives you an all access pass. You can be a part of every call, group, class and community.
A $25 annual membership gives you access to one class, one Social Interest group and our online communities.
A $12 annual membership gives you access to our Friday calls with the publisher, our online community.
Register New Account
Need more info? A complete list of benefits is here.
—
Photo credit: Roberto Nickson from Pexels