How Many Close Friends Does the Average Person Have?

Friendship. It is a term that may make one think of fun-filled parties, soul-searching conversations at midnight, and loyalty in the best and worst of times.

It is a common occurrence for people to confuse close friends with simple people whom one knows. But that is not the case. Of course, many people have never realized that the number of friends one has can really influence his or her life.

What does it even mean to have close friends? But more to the point, how can this be used to improve your own social relationships?

What it means to have close friends

Talking simply, Close friends are those individuals or the person with whom we share a deep mutual bond, it’s from both side. They may be the people we run to when in trouble or share with when we are most successful.

One good example is the Covid-19 incident that happened in the year 2020. When the lockdown measures began and social distancing was encouraged, the sentiment felt lonely. It became like everyone was in their own little worlds.

Many thought that social relations would never recover and would remain severely compromised. However, as the restrictions began to ease, it was possible to observe the importance of close friendships more vividly.

The people who nurtured a few good friends as their social capital were the resilient ones. It was the worst for those who used only casual acquaintances as the means of getting the materials or information.

Friendship is premised on the fact that it is always better to have few good friends than many and so it provides chances for better and more intimate relationships.

Insights from research on friendship

One of the most famous studies on friendship comes from anthropologist Robin Dunbar who famously proposed:

“The number of people we can maintain stable social relationships with is about 150.”

Despite the fact that Dunbar’s number appears to be quite high, most people think that it concerns close friendship. After all, the concept seems so simple: It is impossible to sustain too many relationships since our brain can only handle a certain number.

However, the process of identifying one’s close friends within this larger network is rather more complex by definition. Not all 150 connections are going to be strong or valuable in any way or form.

Dunbar has been one of the best when it comes to explaining these layers of friendship and we found that we have approximately five close friends.

Another important scholar in this area is Jeffrey Hall. Hebegan his friendship research and has emerged as one of the most prominent scholars in the field.

According to Hall, the strategy was to consider the time that is taken to transform from an acquaintance to a close friend.

When Hall conducted his studies, he realized that it would require fifty hours of interaction to get from being an acquaintance to a casual friend, ninety hours to become a friend and over two hundred hours to be considered a close friend.

As Hall once said:

“You can’t snap your fingers and make a friend. Maintaining close relationships is the most important work we do in our lives.”

Why the number of close friends matters

Therefore, how does number of close friends affect our lives? there are several reason, but here i will talk some, why it matters.

Mental Health:

The number of friends and social relationship for example CF. are directly proportional with good mental health. But’t it’s not about number of friends do you have, the quality is IMPORTANT.

Longevity:

Well, I will not believe this but it is a fact that social relationships are associated with increased life span. Consider the concept of the Blue Zones, places where people live to be very old. One common factor? Strong social ties.

This is showed by Susan Pinker in her book “The Village Effect” where she explains how the real life touch and interaction and close friends and family can make us happier, healthier and smarter.

Stress Reduction:

Friends are a type of protection against different stressors of life. When we have a few reliable people to lean on, our coping capacity with regards to challenges boosts significantly.

Shelley E. Taylor in her book ‘The Tending Instinct’ provides a detailed description of how nurturing relationship including friendship assist in the management of stress and enhance our well being.

Personal Growth:

Close friends are the ones who either encourage us to take up new projects, help us in achieving our goals and also give us frank advice. This results in a high potential of personal development over the years.

Life Satisfaction:

It is generally found that people prefer to have fewer numbers of friend but with whom they are very close and intimate. This is especially important in friendship where quality definetly overtakes quantity.

It has allowed me to make long-standing meaningful friendships that are the source of joy in my life.

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Thus, all the successful people have a core group of friends because they know the importance of true friendship.

They do not seek for popularity or thousands of friends; they build a few close and strong connections. And this principle doesn’t only apply in friendship, but in life.

In matters concerning the selection of company, time to be spent with, people to share with, or even support to be sought; it pays to concentrate on the few.

It’s okay to not have as many friends as possible but rather to have close friends and take time to know them. What you may possibly discover is that it is the most rewarding decision you could make.

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I hope you enjoyed reading. This blog post comes from what I’ve learned, what I think, and what I believe. Sign up for my Medium newsletter.

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This post was previously published on medium.com.

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