This blog post is based on my opinions thoughts and thinking.
For me, it’s not easy to admit that I have a problem. But I do.
I’ve been meaning to do this for a while, and I finally dare to say it.
I’m quitting these 7 things today to help restore a sense of happiness and balance in my life.
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1. I will not back down.
I’m no pushover.
I believe in speaking the truth, and I will not shrink away from the consequences of doing so.
I will not tolerate backtalk or intimidation because they know me better than I know myself.
And I will never be afraid to say “no.”
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2. I will not compare myself with others.
I’m the only one who knows what’s best for me, and I’m the only one who can decide how my life should turn out. This is my journey, and no one else gets to decide what’s right for me.
I will not stand in the way of my dreams by comparing myself to anyone else.
Others’ achievements are not a reflection of my worth or a measurement of how successful I am as an individual. I will not let the world define my success or failure.
I will look to the past to learn from it, but I will not live there alone. I will look beyond it and focus on what I can make of myself today.
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3. I will not compromise my beliefs.
I’m not stubborn, but I will never give up on who I am and what I believe. I will hold to my beliefs no matter how many people try to make me feel guilty for them.
I will not be afraid of what people think about me because of my beliefs; their opinions don’t matter anyway. The only thing that matters is the way I feel about myself, and if what I believe in helps me feel happy, then I will hold onto it.
I’m not giving up on my beliefs just because others are.
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4. I will not lie to myself.
I will never lie to myself to make myself feel better, even if it means hurting others.
I’m not afraid, to tell the truth to the people who are closest to me, for they deserve it, and I know the truth will help them heal from their wounds. It’s better for me that they know how I feel before I hurt them with lies.
If I can embrace this, then I will be able to live honestly every day.
I’m not afraid of the truth because the truth will set me free.
I will love myself for who I am and accept the things about me that I cannot change.
I will never settle for the second best, in life or love.
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5. I will not force others to change.
I will not force others to become who I think they should be, even if I can see their potential. It’s not my place to judge them and decide what their lives should look like.
I’ve been there before when I was in love with someone who didn’t value me like I thought she should. I refused to believe that she didn’t want the same things out of life that I did. I tried to change her, but it didn’t work out.
I will not force others to be happy with my happiness. I will not try to control the outcomes of their lives simply because I think they should be different.
I will let go of the responsibilities of controlling other people’s destinies, for it is not my place to define what their journey is meant to look like.
I will not be a slave to another’s happiness because I do not own it.
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6. I will not live in the past.
I will not blame people, events, or situations for the way my life turned out.
I will accept that my life was meant to be as it is and make the most of it by focusing on what I can do today and what I can learn from yesterday.
I will not stand in the way of my happiness by dwelling on things that happened years ago and what they meant to me.
I will be grateful for yesterday, no matter how it made me feel, and I will look forward with excitement to what it might bring.
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7. I will not be ashamed of who I am.
I will not be ashamed of my needs and desires because they are human.
I will not be afraid to tell people what I need or want because other people will never know my desires unless I tell them.
I’m not selfish for wanting what I need, and it’s okay to ask someone out on a date simply because I’ve liked them for a long time and felt no one else would ever desire me the way that person does.
I will not be ashamed of my heart. I will love it and myself for the way that it feels because my heart is innocent and I would never do anything to hurt it.
I will accept the person I am because that is what makes me unique and beautiful in this life.
I love myself for the things I am, the things I have been, and the things I will always be.
I hope you can relate to what I’m saying in some way, even if your situation looks completely different from mine.
I’m not trying to get you to believe that my situation is worse and that I’m in a worse place than you, and it’s okay that I’ve been sabotaging myself for years and you haven’t.
We are all created differently, with different strengths and weaknesses, but that doesn’t mean we are in a better place than someone else.
We’re all at different stages of our journeys, even if we sometimes feel like we’re facing the same problems.
This is the only way I can get my head around it.
My story and beliefs are the way that I have chosen to live my life, and if you don’t like them, that’s okay.
But what I am saying right now is that I’m going to stop deliberately wasting time on things that make me unhappy.
I’m going to build a life worth living instead of one filled with regrets and wasted time.
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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White Fragility: Talking to White People About Racism | Escape the “Act Like a Man” Box | The Lack of Gentle Platonic Touch in Men’s Lives is a Killer | What We Talk About When We Talk About Men |
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Photo credit: Nguyen Thu Hoai on Unsplash