I carry a weight every day;the pressure of securing work that lets me breathe, provide for my family, and live fully. This is how I refuse to be invisible.
Twenty years in, 60 years old, and still determined to find work that matters.
I want to say it.
I want to say it out of frustration and anger at an industry I’ve spent more than twenty years building a career in an industry that now seems ready to toss me aside. Why? I’m not entirely sure. Perhaps because communication has become a minefield; everyone is afraid to speak openly, leaving feedback vague, indirect, or meaningless.
I’ve been without employment for a long stretch. I was let go from my last role after barely enough time to get fully onboarded. Since then, I’ve applied, interviewed, and waited. Looking for a job is painful and long – something I wouldn’t wish on anyone. That said, why would I ever take a low-paying role just for the sake of a paycheck? I don’t want to go through this grueling process again. I want to work somewhere doing interesting work, with a strong culture, a supportive team, and fair compensation. My time, energy, and experience deserve nothing less.
I’ve gone through multi-stage interviews and leadership assessments lasting hours, only to be told, without explanation, that another candidate was chosen. Days pass without a call, email, or text. I’ve been left alone with my thoughts; harsh companions filled with doubt, isolation, sadness, even a sense of worthlessness.
I’m a newly minted 60-year-old facing what feels like a professional wall. And yet I’m not done. Far from it. I still have energy, insight, and experience that can make a difference. Age isn’t a limitation – it’s perspective. It’s resilience. It’s the ability to see opportunities others overlook and execute with precision, patience, and skill honed over decades.
Work is who I am. And yet, it’s more than that: I often feel I cannot fully enjoy life because I carry this weight every day; the pressure, the uncertainty, the burden of securing a job that allows me to breathe easier, take my family out for dinner, or save enough for a vacation. Time feels like it’s running out, and every day without progress sharpens that urgency.
I want to contribute to something meaningful, to be part of a team that values collaboration, creativity, and integrity. I want to be somewhere people show up excited to do good work, where my effort is met with respect, culture, and fair compensation. I’ve faced rejection, felt invisible, and endured the long, painful process of seeking opportunity. But I will not be sidelined.
I will continue to pursue, create, and excel. I am not finished. Not now. Not ever.
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This Post is republished on Medium.
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Photo credit: iStock
