A good friend from Texas said to me years ago when a dark wave took me straight down to rock bottom, “hey baby, you’re either growing, or you’re going”.
This week my friend sent me an Instagram reel. It is pretty amazing the power in a message from a cartoon character. The reel was titled “It’s All a Wave, Baby” and in one minute it was summed up so profoundly. Sometimes we sink into rock bottom, other times we float, and while we’re floating, we wait. And right when we’re about to give up, the biggest most beautiful wave comes and puts us back on top. And such is life, learning how to swim in the tides that ebb and flow. We sink. We float. We rise back up, once again.
It quite literally is all a bunch of waves.
The last time I published an article was close to one year ago when I was beginning nursing school during the peak of a pandemic. I have since been a firsthand witness to these waves of life. I have been privy to it while standing at a patient’s bedside. I watch them fight. I see their breath wax and wane as they experience the downfall of their illness. And sometimes, something extraordinary happens, beyond our understanding of everything science teaches us about the human body, their beautiful wave comes right before we think they are about to give up. Other times, they stop fighting, and we allow them to let go, peacefully and with dignity.
I’ve swam the ocean of these waves for fifteen bittersweet months now. Sometimes they knocked me down, and other times, I too, rose back up. I am now a few weeks shy of celebrating the honor of my candle-lighting and pinning ceremony where I get to wear the white coat and take an oath before my family, friends, faculty, colleagues, and G-d. It took an unwavering belief, and faith in myself to get here. It took surrendering to the fact that it is okay to ask for help. It is okay to reach out and lean on others when you’re not sure if you have it in you to keep going. I am blessed for the friendships I’ve made, and to be surrounded by people whom I trust and admire that share the same compassion, and grit as myself.
At times, it truly felt like one giant ocean of hurricane waves. But somehow, through it all, I surfed the high tide. I’ve run the race and I am now in the final stretch of the marathon. I can see the finish line.
This year has taught me so much about myself. It has taught me my capabilities, my strengths, and weaknesses, my boundaries, my will, my dedication, but most of all my commitment and calling in life to serve others during their most critical moments.
It comes at a time of not just a crumbling healthcare system, but of great social divide in our country. A time when cultural competence needs to be practiced most, and it doesn’t matter what your race, religion, ethnicity, or sexual orientation is – none of these things mean good or bad – they mean each of us are human and unique in our own beautiful way.
So why am I sharing this, now, of all times?
Because I want to remind anyone who is reading this that wherever you are in your journey, or however you may be struggling, no matter how dark it feels, the sun still continues to shine. And as the waves ebb, and flow, the world continues to turn. We can breathe deeply into knowing that the light always comes, and darkness will never – ever win.
Keep going, keep fighting. Don’t just wait for the wave to come, trust that it will, and when it does it will always put you right back on top.
I hope you all enjoy the ride.
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