On New Year’s Day Aikido practice in 2021, I got promoted to Godan (5th degree black belt) by Ishibashi Sensei. I was so very happy. That was one of the happiest days of my life. I’ve trained in Aikido for over 35 years.
After practice, I sat with Ishibashi Sensei. I said, “Thank you for the promotion.”
Ishibashi Sensei said, “It’s from Mizukami Sensei. He wanted to promote you before he passed.”
The promotion was the promotion. Godan was meaningful, because it came from the late Mizukami Sensei and Ishibashi Sensei. They are meaningful to me. They are the most important men in life.
When I made Shodan (1st degree black belt), I told Mizukami Sensei, “Thank you, Sensei.” Sensei smiled. He said, “I didn’t do anything. You did it.” In Aikido practice, Ishibashi Sensei reminds, “Everything quiet inside.” I’m not Godan without Mizukami Sensei and Ishibashi Sensei. They made me look within, look inside me. I still had to put in the work, work on myself, and look within. Everything I needed was already there. They were teaching me that all along.
On Variety Actors on Actors, Academy Award Best Actor Brendan Frasier and Golden Globes Best Actor Nominee Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson discussed Brendan’s movie Rental Family (2025). Brendan played American Actor Phil Vanderploeg, who worked for a Rental Family Agency in Tokyo. Since the 1980’s, Rental Family Companies provided family members for their paying clients. They provide a vital and valuable service for what’s missing in people’s lives.
In Rental Family, Phil asked Rental Family employee Aiko, “Why do you do this?”
Aiko said, “Sometimes, all need is someone to look us in the eye and remind us that we exist.”
On Variety Actors on Actors, Brendan asked, “Can I ask you? Do you think that there is a villain in Rental Family? You gotta think about it.”
Dwayne said, “You gotta think about it.”
Brendan said, “I don’t think there is. Aside from apathy.”
Dwayne said, “Apathy. And I was just going to say, ‘Just hold up the mirror.’”
Brendan said, “Yes… Look within.”
Dwayne nodded, “Look within.”
Brendan said, “Go on that journey and you’ll complete it. When you stop seeking it out from other people, ways of behaving. Just take stock of yourself.”
In Aikido, I stopped listening to the voice inside me that said, “I’m no good.” That was really my Dad’s voice when I was 8 years old. His voice had become mine over the years.
So, I listened to Mizukami Sensei, “Just train. It’s not like you have to get somewhere.” I listened to Ishibashi Sensei, “Everything quiet.” I let go my fear inside that I’m not good enough over, and over, and over again. Although my fear inside never competely disappeared, it got less and less. I free myself more and more.
When I looked within, I found that I was strong, that I was a good man. That I was good enough. I always was. I just had to look within and get that I was. Ishibashi Sensei said that everything we need is inside ourselves. We’re born with it there. Sometimes in living life and experiencing trauma, we forget that everything we need is inside. Just train. I look within, not outside. I know what I have. It’s okay. I’m okay.
We can look outside for people or things to make us happy, to make us fulfilled. Look within, instead. Find what you’re looking for inside yourself. It’s there. It always was. It’s going to be okay. You’re okay.
