My First Month on TikTok

I proudly did not join the clock app for 3 years however, I wanted to immerse myself in understanding making short form and, in a month, I have created 80+ pieces. Creating those 80 pieces and learning how to build community on that platform. It has been very interesting listening to how people take their personal life experiences as law, as to how life should be based on their own positive or negative life experiences. They say that since they did ABC and received success then if you are not successful or do not follow their method then something is wrong with you and vice versa.

If there is anything I have learned in the last couple of decades of my life, it’s that life is not black and white, life is nuanced & full of grays. For all of the things I have learned since being on TikTok, some things should NEVER come out of a person’s mouth on a public platform. Some things are left best between one journal and their therapist. I notice people getting on the site disparaging a lifestyle while elevating another lifestyle without fully understanding the nuances of the lifestyle that they are disparaging or the one that they are elevating.

Agreements and Mindsets

I wrote Shadows within Light out of an expression of wishing that we would look at life from more than just our perspective, whether that perspective is comfort, progression, pain, or trauma. In the 5th agreement, Don Miguel Ruiz uses and wonderful metaphor “that each person is the main character, the scriptwriter and director for her or his own movie.” It takes intentional work not the see the world from your own point of view. What is extremely disappointing even with knowledge, wisdom, and exposure to the perspective of others at our fingertips via the internet. We as humans still won’t do the work:

Make a conscious decision and effort, if the truth you discover is different from your current thoughts. You will approach this truth with a GROWTH MINDSET.
Researching & finding out the truth.
Sitting with the truth and allowing it to challenge the perspective and myths that have been incorporated into your mindset.
Embracing that truth
Incorporating that truth into their ideology
Allowing that truth to assist in changing attitudes, words, & behaviors

Due to the negative stigmatism that is associated with receiving therapy. I think people miss the important purpose of going to counseling or getting counseling.

In Shanteism counseling is there to give you a chance to explore and understand yourself, to gain an external perspective on your interworking so that you may obtain new skills on how you can deal, heal or grow YOU.

Another way to outline Counseling:

“The counseling process is, in many ways, like an educational experience. The individual can learn more about him/herself, but also acquires new skills.

Sometimes, counseling involves learning more about a particular condition (e.g., depression, anxiety, eating disorders) by which the person is affected, so that he/she can better understand treatment options.

Below are some examples of what students can gain from personal counseling:

improved communication and interpersonal skills
greater self-acceptance and self-esteem
ability to change self-defeating behaviors/habits
better expression and management of emotions, including anger
relief from depression, anxiety, or other mental health conditions
increased confidence and decision-making skills
ability to manage stress effectively
improved problem-solving and conflict-resolution abilities
greater sense of self and purpose
recognition of distorted thinking”

We have been in a season of loneliness and depression for many people regardless of social and economic class. As many of my contemporaries have written about on this platform, we lost an amazing talent in Twitch this month. From an outside view, he had what many people wanted, a nice home great career, a loving family, and a modicum of financial security what else could anyone want. On the flip side, I listen to a young lady from a single mother’s home laminate over the pain and struggles she endure, and in her closing statement of her video state, her mother’s love for them was not enough to sustain her. People are living life in their own movie theatres and are hurting.

As celebrate the birth of hope and salvation this Christmas eve and Christmas, take time to reflect on the past miracle of light when there should have been darkness via Hanukkah, or maybe we are renewing our commitments to self, family, and community with Kwanzaa. Don’t forget to listen and notice when your loved ones are not ok and let them know it is ok not to be ok and we are together in getting the help we need to be ok.

TB Obwoge has also written a piece dealing with suicide and the black diaspora that is worth checking out:

Kennedie speaks of depression during this time of year:

However, these are just my thoughts.

Sources and Resources

Black Indigenous and People of Color (BIPOC) Mental Health Fact Sheet | Resources to Recover
compiled by Danielle Leblanc, MSW, Diversity Outreach Resource Specialist, Laurel House, Inc. & www.rtor.org Resources…
www.rtor.org

Potential Benefits of Counseling | Coe College
Skip to main content The counseling process is, in many ways, like an educational experience. The individual can learn…
www.coe.edu

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This post was previously published on medium.com.

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