There’s of lot of advice for what to do on a first date. Eric Santos offers a list of “please don’ts”.
Whether you want to believe it or not, first dates are a lot like interviews. You are telling someone about yourself in hopes of impressing them, and whether they realize it or not, they are making judgments about you based on what you say.
The stakes for a date are not nearly as high as they are in an interview; however, you still want to make sure you make a good first impression.
Whether you’re a guy or a girl, you should avoid using clichés, especially on the first date. They show a lack of originality and are a surefire way to come across as basic.
Below are 10 common clichés that I have heard from women during first dates. If you’re reading this list and recognize that you use some, try to be a bit more original so you sound more like an individual than a member of the general population’s pack:
“I’m not like other girls”
There are more than 3 billion women in the world; it’s safe to say not all of them are alike.
Believing all other women are the same yet somehow, you are better than them is an easy way to come off as really arrogant.
“I’m down to earth”
Every inhabitant on this planet is “down to earth” due to this little thing called gravity.
Describing yourself as down to earth is extremely unoriginal and provides nearly no insight to your personality.
“I get along with guys more than girls”
There is nothing wrong with having guy friends or even more guy friends than female friends. However, when I hear this cliché, it’s usually followed by something along the lines of “because girls are jealous haters.”
There is no need to bring down other women in efforts to explain why you don’t have them as friends.
“Most girls don’t share the same interests as me”
I’ve been told before by some women that they get along better with guys because they have more in common, like sports and cars, and that other girls only care about shopping and makeup.
This just promotes sexist stereotypes and generalizations.
“I listen to everything”
I chuckle a little whenever I ask a woman what type of music she listens to and she replies with this cliché. It’s almost never true, as there are so many genres and subgenres out there.
Listening to Top 100, EDM and some hip-hop doesn’t mean you listen to “everything.” Just say some genres or an artist instead.
“I hate liars”
This cliché’ is unnecessary because nobody actually loves liars. Let’s be honest: Does anyone enjoy being the victim of a lie?
Probably not; however, there is very little value added to the conversation in saying you hate liars. Using this cliché can make you come across as apprehensive.
“I’ve been told that I am intimidating”
Telling me that people find you intimidating will not intimidate me of you. For whatever reason, some people find it flattering when they learn they have been described as intimidating.
It might stem from the fear of being seen as “too approachable.”
“I’m tired of drama and/or games.”
People who use this cliché tend to attract drama and play games. Using this cliché also projects the sentiment, “I still have lingering feelings of resentment about past relationships.”
It’s understandable to carry baggage; just don’t make it so visible.
“I work hard, but play harder”
Those who really work hard are rarely going around, telling people about how hard they work. This cliché is usually used to describe someone’s work-life balance.
If you are using this cliché, you are ironically not working hard enough to describe yourself.
“I am the best girlfriend when I am in a relationship”
If you use this cliché on the first date, you may scare the guy away because you are already alluding to a relationship.
It may seem like you’re saying this because you’re not as good of a person when you’re single or just dating.
Photo: Ding Yuin Shan/Flickr
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