[Today’s post is part of a new series of short parables about the creative life, chosen from my almost forty years as a creativity coach. Please enjoy! To be in touch, you can reach me at [email protected]. To subscribe to my Craft of Coaching weekly newsletter, please visit here. To subscribe to “Tales of the Creative Life,” please visit here.]
Miriam hated open studio Saturdays. She could easily list her reasons: she had no idea how to talk about her paintings; she has no idea how to make small talk; few visitors came; the ones who did come hardly responded to her work; those who did respond were perfunctory, glib, or patronizing; and no one ever bought.
So, she had gotten into the habit of beating them to the punch. If they weren’t going to tell her how good her work was, she was going to tell them.
“That’s a very good painting,” she would say to a visitor looking at one of her paintings.
Of course, that would put the visitor off. If the visitors were a couple, one would gesture to the other, on the order of “Did you hear what she said? Really! Let’s get out of here.”
If a visitor moved from painting to painting, Miriam would tag along and at each painting say, “That’s a very good painting.” No visitor could stand much of that.
Miriam was having a bitter moment at three p.m. one Saturday afternoon. Almost no one had visited. Yet again, she had wasted a ton of time hosting this absurd and painful charade. Another Saturday with no painting done, no sales made, no echo from the mean and silent world. She could hardly wait for four p.m., when she could close and lock her studio door.
A middle-aged man entered. He had the look of a professor. He smiled and seemed at ease, unlike so many visitors, who looked more like deer in the headlights.
“Great light,” he said, glancing around.
“Yes.”
“Northern light, isn’t it?”
“Yes. Are you a painter?”
“No, no!” he replied. But he didn’t go on to divulge his profession or identity.
He stopped in front of a large painting.
“That’s a very good painting,” Miriam said, but in something of a whisper.
“I agree!” the visitor said, nodding. “Absolutely.”
Tears welled up in Miriam’s eyes. “No one ever says that,” she replied.
“That’s too bad,” he said. “They should.”
“What do you like about it?”
She had high hopes for his reply. She waited expectantly.
“It’s a very nice size and shape,” the visitor said.
“A very nice size and shape?”
“Yes. Not too large. Not too small.”
“That’s it?”
“Well, it wouldn’t go in many living rooms. You’d need a very special customer. Oh, by the way, I’m an interior decorator,” he said, smiling. “I’m out hunting for talent. You do very nice work—not what my customers are looking for, but very nice. Probably unsalable—but very nice.”
It was six months before Miriam could make herself host another open studio Saturday.
—
**
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Eric Maisel is an internationally-respected diplomat coach who specializes in creativity coaching, existential wellness coaching, and relationship coaching. He trains coaches and provides workshops and webinars nationally and internationally.
Dr. Maisel is the author of 50+ books, writes the “Rethinking Mental Health” blog for Psychology Today (with 3.5 million views), blogs for The Good Men Project and Fine Art America, serves as lead editor for the Ethics International Press Critical Psychology and Critical Psychiatry series, and is co-founder of Purposely, the life navigation app.
Dr. Maisel’s books include Fearless Creating, Rethinking Depression, Coaching the Artist Within, The Van Gogh Blues, The Power of Daily Practice, Redesign Your Mind, and scores of other titles. He has been published by Penguin Random House, McGraw Hill, Rodale, Harper San Francisco, Shambhala, New World Library, and Conari/Mango, among many others.
Dr. Maisel has created three certificate programs with Noble-Manhattan Coaching, a Creativity Coach Certificate and Diploma Program, an Existential Wellness Coach Certificate Program, and a Certified Relationship Coach program. With Lynda Monk of the International Association for Journal Writing, Dr. Maisel has created an Art of Journal Coaching Self-Study Plus program.
Dr. Maisel’s most recent books are Why Smart, Creative and Highly Sensitive People Hurt (2023), Affirmations for Self-Love (with Lynda Monk, 2024), Parents Who Bully (2024), and Choose Your Life Purposes (2024). Dr. Maisel lives in the San Francisco Bay Area and maintains a thriving international coaching practice.
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