“Can you fall for someone you’ve never met?”
Past surveys show that men take around 88 days to confess their love and 39 percent would just take about a month. In the meantime, women shoot those three-little-words in a lengthy 134 days. It would also depend on age groups since young people (18–24 years old) are swift to conclude themselves in an exclusive relationship. Though, these studies are for those who met and interacted physically.
Some experts say that you can simply identify a potential partner online just by chatting. We eventually fail to notice external turn-offs and may lead us to a much deeper connection. Even centuries ago, people assume they’re in love through written words and with an imaginary physical fantasy of the other person. Today, with the help of the internet, it is more convenient to have a vast network of plausible lovers that you can choose from.
In a matter of swiping right or left with dating applications, you can get yourself an instant someone whom you can talk to. Random strangers with an eye-catching bio and similar interest as yours. The mysterious life that they have which intrigues you to get to know them more. Profile pictures that you think are cute can give you an array of imaginations. Wondering how it would feel like to touch their skin and what kind of warmth or smell they have, I’m not referring to a sexual way but just to get that rooted connection out.
. . .
The city traffic was jammed as I got on a bus going home. I put out my phone and changed the current song; then suddenly got a notification from the dating app I just recently downloaded. The usual message of hi’s and hellos got a bit dull so I swiped right and left randomly. Surprisingly got my thumb stuck when I saw a pretty smile. Swiped right and shot a message, she replied.
We started to get to know our daily lives and agreed to schedule a meeting in person. Unexpectedly, the pandemic happened. An immediate declaration of lockdown on our cities got us to postpone our supposed date. But this didn’t stop us from talking yet. Since getting together was not possible as of the moment, we exchanged some stuff via instant couriers. As days pass, we had this emotional and mental connection that I never had and felt with anyone. I was understood at a deeper level.
Oftentimes, we assume that when they make us laugh and smile — the feeling is mutual. But then again, it can also be one-sided. The time I spent talking to her gave me realizations — love was in the air again. I got off a rough five-year-long relationship and built the highest wall on trust. She made me feel safe to lower it down and got my hopes up that we have a thing. I fell for her — it may seem fast and some may think it’s not possible since she’s a “nevermet” but my feelings are true and valid.
A month after, there were no more messages and everything was left on seen. There were no arguments but just like that… all of a sudden, a change of heart. The beginning of my sleepless nights welcomed me and this bothersome question that absorbed my soul.
“What did I do wrong?”
It took weeks after she replied and explained her fleeting emotions.
Most of us are confused individuals. We get to hurt people with our hurt. Though, that doesn’t make us an awful person. Life is a journey toward endless discoveries. Most likely, we get to meet someone different every day. Each of them is sent to us as lessons or blessings. Our mission is even virtually possible, we are capable to change lives and perspectives through the internet. Don’t be disheartened with online flings, never be afraid to love again and again. The world is already full of those who love half-heartedly. Be the one who fully loves because that’s the way it’s supposed to be.
I would never forget my seemingly-pandemic-fling. An angel intentionally sent to enlighten the purpose that I should grasp — endowing me with knowledge. Her quest has finally ended.
This post was previously published on Hello, Love and is republished here with permission from the author.
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