“You are needed. You are valued. You are loved,” I said, kissing his cheek.
“You are wanted. You are appreciated. You are loved,” he replied.
A few weeks back, I was listening to a podcast called, “While Black” that featured a panel of Black men sharing their experience with racism. Listening to this, I discovered an opportunity to add more affirmations into my daily interactions.
Affirmations are not something I grew up with my parents explaining to me. To be honest, I didn’t even really understand the power of my own mind until college, as an athlete my coaches stressed positive self-talk and mental stamina.
So it made me wonder, why when it comes to relationships, I wasn’t leveraging more positive, verbal affirmations with my partner? My guess is that I tend to place a ton of weight on actions and outcomes. Now, I am beginning to see that verbal reinforcement invites us both to feel loved.
Look, words are important. Have you ever loved someone that made you cry? I sure have. Have you ever failed and balled your eyes out in the car on the way home? Yep, done that too. I’ve loved myself a lot in some years, and a little in others. No one is perfect. I’ve loved people that were kind and others that tried to break me into a subdued version of what they desired instead of who I was.
At the end of the day, while I tend to stress the importance of actions, words can be a beautiful tool to build a more healthy, inspired, and positive environment for relationships. So during the COVID, my partner and I have begun sharing phrases like the ones below to ensure we raise one another up in difficult times. We remind each other,
You are needed. You are valued. You are loved.
You see, words manifest as truth. The more often we speak, the more likely those things will come into existence, words have power. So in my house, we use those words to ensure we remember,
You are beautiful You are powerful. You are purposeful.
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Previously published on “Hello, Love”, a Medium publication.
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Photo credit: Daniel Monteiro on Unsplash