“The eternal contest between good and evil is not fought with great armies… But one life at a time.” – Beverly Penn in Winter’s Tale
To begin with, Tyler learned how to use his heart in a way that was never modeled to him. He wanted a type of approval and affirmation that his father did not give to him, at least as an adult, but he chose to embrace the type of man that he wanted to be and gave that kind of approval and affirmation to his little sister. He took what he learned from his pain and tried to help her either avoid or process her own pain at her young age with his advanced wisdom in the area. Tyler gave away something that he longed to receive and this action poured a lot of life into his loved ones.
Tyler was also his sister’s best friend. Even when his advice wasn’t perfect, it still brought about a world of good to her. He tried to help his sister Caroline fit in with kids her own age who had been teasing her. On one hand, he gave her good advice in that she had to make an effort to make friends. You never know, maybe someone will surprise you in a good way. Though on the other hand, why should she have to make an effort to be friends with jerks? So she can finally get into their clique just to mistreat the next person who comes along that takes her place as another deemed loser of the moment? That’s not really friendship. Anyhow, his sister’s peers turn out to be too cruel to be friends, but it does help her father to step up and show his daughter the style of love that she longs for from him. The father’s love language was providing for his family, but he learned through Tyler’s leadership in the area that sometimes a child can’t live on money alone and needs to know they have their father’s time and heart.
Furthermore, Tyler helped his girlfriend Ally to be the woman she wanted to be instead of forever the child in her father’s shadow. Likewise, he helped Ally’s father, Sgt. Craig, to learn that his daughter can still want and need him as a father even if she isn’t a child anymore. Sgt. Craig did not need to control Ally’s decisions in order for her to choose to love him and want him in her life; she became more independent but loved him with the same abundance. Sometimes parents seem to have a hard time with this. It was awesome to see his character grow like that and accept who his daughter was now instead of only accepting who she used to be.
“The dream of the child is the hope of the man.” – A Winter’s Tale by Queen
Tyler did not invest himself in his future and in his responsibilities the way he was expected to, but he lived a high impact life that brought healing and happiness to people he loved. He embraced a childlike yet sophisticated perspective of how his world and the people in it could be better off and he dedicated himself to helping his loved ones find their way and their value and their love. He took a lot of grief for being a hot mess, but in the end, he became exactly what was needed to be great. Loving others and being loved is enough of a miracle and a destiny even if not everything else goes right. We’ve got this!
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This Post is republished on Medium.
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Photo credit: Shutterstock
