Handle With Care
You gotta admit, self-care is the like the new “being present.” Remember when that’s all everyone said, all the time?
Now, it’s about taking care of self, first.
I’ve even seen T-shirts. “Self-Care Junkie” comes to mind. Saw that design one morning, of course at brunch. And if brunch isn’t the most self-absorbed thing one can do, then I don’t know what is.
And therein lies the fine line between self-care and self-absorbedness. When does taking care of ourselves simply become solipsism?
Probably when we start proclaiming it on T-shirts. At brunch.
But seriously, I’m all for self-care. The last two years taught me that I wasn’t taking care of me, and so my physical and mental health deteriorated. I had to, as the metaphor goes, put my oxygen mask on first before my loved ones.
While the plane of life is in a nosedive, yes, self-care is essential, but so is caring for those we love. As a husband and father with a full-time job, I just don’t have the luxury of caring for myself, all the time.
What I’ve learned over the past two years is to prioritize me first, yes, then switch gears to care for others around me, be they my wife and sons, friends, work colleagues, or projects.
I’ve also reminded myself how to find joy in caring for others as a means to my own self-care. It’s transforming the concept of duty obligation into loving service opportunity, which demands practice and patience.
But, yes, guys, we can do it.
I’ve also learned that self-care for men is necessary for our survival, and if we’re not building it into our schedules or asking for it directly, we lose out on the opportunity to recover our lost energy.
What follows is resentment toward everyone and everything in our lives, and we all know how that ends.
Bottom line: self-care is life-giving. It doesn’t have to be weekend-long spa retreats, nor does it have to be so pretentious that it demands a T-shirt.
What it should be is sacred to YOU. It should be a ceremony. It should be that place where you want to go DAILY, so that you can spend time with the most important friend in your life. YOU.
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This Post is republished on Medium.
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Photo credit: Unsplash
