You might be surprised how many people worry about their lack of confidence. It holds them back when it comes to their work and social life. It’s something they wish they could change about themselves. Are you one of those people? Are you still “faking it until you make it” when it comes to your confidence?
Stop. Put your mind in neutral, right now. Let yourself believe a “confident you” is not a huge mountain of work, but just a few small changes away. Now that you’ve made that important first mental step, here are a few suggestions to build your self-esteem and become more self-confident.
Believe in Yourself
This is an extension of the “mental reality check” I mentioned above. If you have a habit of thinking you will never achieve your goals and dreams, is it any surprise when that self-fulfilling prophecy keeps coming true?
Stop waiting for the ship to come in, for the planets to align, for luck or fate or whatever. Your wish is your command!
You want your ship to come in? Then become captain of that ship!
What’s the alternative? You never reach the potential you know you have within. What comes next? The rest of your life, filled with regrets.
Regrets suck. Don’t have them.
Yeah, it’s going to take some work to learn how to believe in yourself. Do it anyway. What do you have to lose?
Think about the positives of you, for once. Are you a caring person? Do you have a skill that makes other people envious? Focus on your strengths (yes, you have them).
If you emphasize the good stuff, it will help you to believe in yourself. When a good opportunity comes up, rather than being full of fear, think about the positives.
If you believe in yourself and follow your gut, you will reach your targets and goals. But just remember sometimes the path you take to your dreams isn’t the obvious one.
Make the journey to happiness an indirect one by not worrying about happiness. If you’re being true to yourself and your passions, the way will open before you. The solutions will appear.
Have some faith in yourself.
Wear What You Like
For a lot of people, their lack of confidence comes down to what they wear. They might follow the crowd and wear particular things out of peer pressure.
But if you don’t feel confident in your wardrobe, you’re going to be less confident in your life.
Therefore, it’s time to wear what you like. Choose clothes that make you feel a lot more confident around others.
Pick clothes that match your personality as this can give you a boost. For example, if you are a fan of Superman, why not get some superhero t-shirts. Wearing clothes that reflect your true self will give your confidence a much-needed bolstering.
Forget About the Negatives
So many people focus on the negatives. Like any other species in the animal kingdom, we have a negativity bias that has helped us survive for millennia.
If you want to boost your confidence, you need to be mindful of the negativity bias.
In other words, don’t let your lizard brain win and drown you in fear! Put the negatives thoughts at the back of your mind and push yourself to try things that scare you.
I’m not recommending you decide to start skydiving or engaging in other physically risky behaviors! I’m talking more about the social realm of life, here. Unless skydiving is something you’ve always wanted to try…just be safe about it!
Don’t Worry What Others Think
For a lot of people, their lack of confidence stems from worrying about what other people think.
They don’t want to attend a party with strangers as they believe that they won’t like them. Or they don’t do a particular hobby as they think others will judge them.
But unless you stop worrying about others, you won’t ever have enough confidence in your life.
So, forget about pleasing other people and just do what you want to do (unless you’re hurting someone else…do what you want, but avoid hurting others). As I said in a previous blog post, once you stop worrying about others, you will have a taste of real freedom.
One more tip: surround yourself with people who you know care about you and build you up rather than break you down.
Okay, that’s all for now! Get out there and put the tips above into action. Start small, take baby steps, and you’ll find the confidence you’re seeking.
This post was previously published on LiveTheHero.com and is republished here with permission from the author.
Have you read the original anthology that was the catalyst for The Good Men Project? Buy here: The Good Men Project: Real Stories from the Front Lines of Modern Manhood
If you believe in the work we are doing here at The Good Men Project and want to join our calls on a regular basis, please join us as a Premium Member, today.
All Premium Members get to view The Good Men Project with NO ADS.
Need more info? A complete list of benefits is here.
Photo credit: Shutterstock