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I love you, and I’m angry, or hurt, or frustrated or whatever, and I want to stay connected and work this out.
Can there be more than one emotion in one place at one time?
Can I feel my anger, and know that there is love?
Can I feel my anger and stay with you to express or resolve or understand what’s happening, to talk, to share, to listen?
If the intention comes from the heart, if loving you is so important, if our relationship is so important; we can.
Firstly it’s about being present.
So much of what we feel is from the past, stored hurt that’s coming into the moment. Partly because it was never resolved. Partly because we never left it there. Partly because we’re doing the same thing in the same way, so I’m reacting rather than responding.
There’s a question to ask to help with this. Is it real? Is what I’m feeling, happening now. Or is it a pattern that plays out in this situation in my life.
When we’re present, we can move from reaction to response, from a level of stress to possibility, from contraction to expansion. We can feel the hurt, acknowledge it, name it; it’s there.
And because of love, for myself, for you, for us, I want to stay in the space of connection.
This needs intention, and awareness of that intention, and constant connecting to it, unwavering.
Breath is a powerful way to maintain that, to keep you in your body, keep you there.
I need will, willingness, energy, to stay there, to be with the feelings, allow them. And a willingness to move through them. Engage with them, explore them. And then allow them to move into something else.
In this, I can stay connected.
And in this, I can deepen the intimacy and connection to myself, to you, to life.
And to love.
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This post was originally published on eroslife.co.za and is republished with the author’s permission.
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