Do you remember the day when you passed your drives exam received your license? How did you feel? Excited and probably a little nervous. Finally you can drive on your own. You (finally) have it: freedom!
But then it rains. Or it freezes. Or it snows. Now, how ready do you feel?
The lesson you learn is that it’s good to be prepared: ask questions, learn from an experienced driver, drive with someone else in a variety of road conditions, study and be prepared, be cautious at first. One of the most important lessons that you learn is that if you wait until you feel ready for every situation, you will never drive the car.
Sometimes, waiting until you feel ready will keep you back.
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No matter where you begin, you will never feel completely ready. And if you do feel completely ready, you are probably headed for a crash because overconfidence is the enemy of successful change.
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Think about a few other examples: You graduate from University, ready to face the world, but inside you are terrified because there are so many things you don’t know. You begin a new job and there is so much that you don’t know and you wonder if you ever will figure out how to do it all. You are a parent, of a teenager.
These are just a few examples how in many areas of your life, you begin before you feel ready.
A principle of growth is that no matter where you begin, you will never feel completely ready. And if you do feel completely ready, you are probably headed for a crash because overconfidence is the enemy of successful change.
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3 Habits that are holding you back from the next stage of your life
1.You are planning too much.
Some planning and research is good. But too much planning can set you up to feel that your next step is HUGE (too HUGE to begin…). Most change consists of a thousand small decisions strung together. How do you know if you are planning too much? You are thinking, “All I need is (fill in the blank) before I begin.” And then (fill in the blank) happens, but then you find yourself adding one more blank. And another. And another.
Just get started: Begin small, take baby steps, do the easy thing first, or do the hardest thing first… doesn’t matter, just start today.
2.You are thinking there is so much riding on it.
Achieving your goal is important and there is a lot riding on being successful. You want to change, to improve. You want to build your dream, lead your project, improve your health and your relationships.
You want to get it right.
The desire to ‘get it right’ has a flip side: Your desire to do it right will set you up. The more you believe that you need to get it right, you will fall to the temptation to wait and procrastinate.
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Some moments, you will know that you are heading in the right direction. Other moments, you won’t be so sure. This is normal, and it is a sign that you are right where you need to be: you are changing.
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Many times, starting a business/parenting/being a couple/saving for the future/pushing yourself to sweat, stretch, and exercise hard/or getting an education doesn’t feel ‘right.’ Most things won’t feel ‘right’ all of the time.
Some moments, you will know that you are heading in the right direction. Other moments, you won’t be so sure. This is normal, and it is a sign that you are right where you need to be: you are changing. Feeling ‘right’ is elusive and it is unpredictable. It will come and go.
3.You already know enough and you have what you need.
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First you have to be a little uncomfortable first and then you will find the motivation, the ideas and the help need. Life has a way of sending what you need when you need it – but here’s the kicker: Life will only send what you need when you are in motion.
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Life won’t send you a survival kit with everything that you may need (“just in case”). First you have to be a little uncomfortable and then you will find the motivation, the ideas or the help that you need. If you need something along the way, you will find it or you will learn it learn it. Life has a way of sending what you need when you need it – but here’s the kicker: Life will only send what you need when you are in motion.
One of the greatest lessons is that investing effort creates energy, effort creates motivation. If you wait until it ‘feels’ right, until you know enough, until you have enough, you won’t do it.
Waiting until you feel ready is a way that your mind will try to prevent you from stepping out. You may be planning too much, wanting to get it ‘right,’ or waiting until you know/have more. In the immortal words of GK Chesterton, “Anything worth doing is worth doing badly.”
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Keep it Real
This post has been republished to Medium.
Photo credit: iStock
