Being a father has taught me invaluable lessons about success, but the biggest revelation I’ve had on this subject has been that success isn’t only about money and big houses but that it can be anything.
Success can be getting your degree, getting your business off the ground, making an extra $100, running 3 feet longer than usual. It can literally be anything and that’s because success is about progressing in your life.
The journey and experience of fatherhood is one incalculable journey that is constantly filled with nuggets of wisdom, when you’re aware of them.
These nuggets have helped me become more successful in my businesses.
1.Success comes to those who are ready for it
This may sound like a cliche but it’s very true. When my wife was pregnant, we started reading books on parenting, we started going to antenatal classes, we went through the age old struggle of finding a name, we were committed. We were committed because although we had not seen our son, we knew that he was coming and so we had to get ourselves ready for his arrival.
Are you ready for your success? You need to be committed to making your success come to fruition, and that takes a lot of effort, time and energy. At times you might not be able to see the light at the end of the tunnel but always remember that success will show up for those who are prepared for and are expecting it.
2.Consistency breeds success
When the Covid-19 storm hit, we went into a very strict lockdown and unfortunately for me, my wife and son were visiting my mom-in-law at that time and we decided that they should stay there a little while. Well, I had not held or seen my son for a whole month and a half.
Finally, by the time when we could be reunited again, I went to pick my wife and son up but when I held him, he couldn’t recognize me and started crying so badly. That tore me up inside as a father because that’s my son and it seemed to me that he didn’t want anything to do with me.
I then later realized that he was being that way with me because he had forgotten me, I couldn’t visit him, couldn’t hold him, couldn’t rock him to sleep for over a month and a half. I had only interacted with him through video calls and that was it.
It hit me that consistency is, to success, what oxygen is to our bodies, and that talking about something is very different to actually doing it consistently.
3.Success and failure are two sides of one coin
My son was in my arms one day while I was sitting on the carpet, when he suddenly lunged forwards almost right out of my arms, I caught him but his head had already slightly hit the wooden TV stand.
He started crying and I felt so bad, if I had a whip I would’ve flogged myself for being such a bad father.
That experience made me think “I don’t want to hold him again, what if I drop him and he gets really hurt next time?”. In fact, I became very cautious when holding him from then on, to the point that we no longer had any fun together. Then it hit me that as a person I have failed so many times but that has never stopped me from getting back up so why should this?
I made up my mind that I will do my best in order to be a great father to my son and that even when I fail, I will get back up and move forward again.
Failure is inevitable but it’s not permanent, just keep getting back up and moving forward because one day the coin will land on success again.
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