The Single Most Important Trait That Reveals the True Person Within

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Most misunderstandings in the world could be avoided if people would simply take the time to ask, “What else could this mean? — Shannon L. Alder

Humans are complicated creatures.

Everyone is different from each other and that’s exactly what makes each one an enigma in their own little ways.

At the start of any relationship, it’s important to gauge the other person for potential red flags.

Also, look for the green flags, such as respecting their subordinates, being honest, and always being kind. a

These are some of the most commonly heard pieces of advice.

But here’s one piece of advice which people rarely talk about but that can make all the difference later on in the relationship.

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Pay Close Attention to This

“Your name is “Shashwath”, not Shashwat!” my friend said to me.

I was shocked!

I have been carrying that spelling of my name for 24 years of my life. And here comes a girl who has only known me for a month, audaciously exclaiming that I use the wrong spelling of my name!

You see in South India, there is a habit of adding an extra “H” at the end of a name if it ends with a “T” sound. Or you can say in North India, there is a habit of omitting “H” from the name!

It does not matter.

To each, their own. That is what I believe in.

But people believe that their way of thinking is the ultimate truth.

Paying close attention to this one thing helps you gauge someone’s personality at a deep level.

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See how they respond to a perspective that’s 360 degrees opposite to theirs.

How do they handle a perspective that’s fairly weird and new for them?

Do they respectfully disagree or are outright dismissive of your perspective?

It reveals a lot about a person.

It shows whether they have an open mind or they prefer to keep a limited approach to things.

The point here is: it’s absolutely fine to not agree with someone else’s point of view. We are who we are after all. But the key factor here is how they choose to respond.

Being able to understand or at least give a fair chance to a different perspective is a sign of character.

You can’t have a healthy conversation with a person who’s too obsessed with their life’s ideology. And also believes that everyone else is supposed to feel the same.

Relationships are all about navigating differences in a mature way. Someone who cannot even keep an open mind to a different perspective, can’t be expected to be a part of a healthy relationship.

If you wish to build a healthy, meaningful relationship, choose someone who has an open mind. One who has the capability to handle differences of opinion maturely.

This seemingly simple advice is so often ignored. You’d have far better relationships if you pay special attention to this.

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This post was previously published on medium.com.

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