When this story started getting popular …
… I was challenged by multiple readers.
The challenge came primarily in the form of a question.
When confronted by expressed racism, what do you do now that’s different from what you did in the past under the same circumstances?
The way I hear it … Hey Burg! What have you done to become more actively anti-racist?
For me, responding to racism is now a three-step process.
Hear the racist out (briefly).
So much racism is covert. I want to “out” racists, hear their views and know without a doubt where they are “coming from.” I’m not offering support; I’m gaining knowledge, about their wrongly-held beliefs.
My favorite phrases here — “I could not disagree more strongly.” or “I completely disagree with you.”
I don’t want there to be any ambiguity.
Also, I do not attack the person. I counter their beliefs.
“Why do you hold the beliefs that you do? What is your source of information that led you to these beliefs?”
These two questions put the onus on the racist, where it belongs. And that’s where I leave it as I exit the discussion.
I am not going to immediately convince an avowed racist about the rightness of my views and the wrongness of theirs. That’s work they have to do. They have to unwind the tangle of their own mistakes.
I think of it like the time I hit a skunk with my car. It took weeks of work — washing every day — to remove the stench.
Besides, racists are not worth more of my time than the amount I’ve already expended engaging them in this three-step process.
Maybe this is all a bit naive. Perhaps it’s too kind. Possibly you think it’s ineffective. Although some experts do promote this approach.
As noted above, I’ve been asked and this is my present answer.
I will continue to evolve and grow.
If you have other helpful views to share or simply wish to disagree with all or part of my approach, please feel free to do so.
Thank you for reading.
This post was previously published on medium.com.
You Might Also Like These From The Good Men Project
|Compliments Men Want to Hear More Often||Relationships Aren’t Easy, But They’re Worth It||The One Thing Men Want More Than Sex||..A Man’s Kiss Tells You Everything|
Join The Good Men Project as a Premium Member today.
All Premium Members get to view The Good Men Project with NO ADS.
A $50 annual membership gives you an all access pass. You can be a part of every call, group, class and community.
A $25 annual membership gives you access to one class, one Social Interest group and our online communities.
A $12 annual membership gives you access to our Friday calls with the publisher, our online community.
Register New Account
Need more info? A complete list of benefits is here.
Photo credit: Ehimetalor Akhere Unuabona on Unsplash