According to this national survey, among those between the ages of 18 and 29, 55% believe that each person determines their own truth while only 42% believe in absolute truth.
I was trained as an engineer. I am also in an older cohort — aged 41–55. For that group, 59% of us believe in absolute truth. I suspect the percentages for engineers are much higher.
For those who believe in absolute truth — we think that one plus one always equals two.
Now, of course, some will point out that this assumes we are not using a binary numeral system. And that we also assume we are not at some quantum boundaries.
Fine.
However, based on such conditions, one plus one equals two. It does not equal what you feel is the right number. Mathematical reality does not care about your feelings.
At this point, someone will point out the parable of the six blind men who touched an elephant. They each described the animal differently. The one who touched its trunk, for example, thought it resembled a snake. The one who touched its ear thought it resembled a fan. And so on.
However, this relates to perception, not reality or absolute truth.
Even when it comes to human relationships, truth does exist.
If a woman tells a man “It’s fine”, then the truth is that she has said those words. However, the reality of what those words mean… the woman’s perception probably differs from the man’s.
However, perception does not equal truth.
Even in human relationships, the idea of “my truth” vs. “your truth” is erroneous.
Here’s a personal example.
When my brother and his wife got a puppy, they kept the dog in its crate for up to 12 hours a day. My mother observed this. She felt that was unfair to the dog so she would let it out of the crate. Then she got yelled at by my brother and his wife since the dog would sometimes chew on things. Well, he was a puppy. Why would anyone get a puppy if they weren’t willing to teach it what it could and could not chew?
My mother called me and my husband several times crying because she felt so sad for the dog who spent all day crying in its crate.
When I visited them to pick up my mother and bring her to live with me, I saw my brother repeatedly put the dog in the crate after I repeatedly let it out. Why? The dog would go to him wanting affection and he didn’t want to be bothered. The dog was attached to him and didn’t understand why it wasn’t loved.
Years later, my sister-in-law denied this ever happened. According to her, they never crated the dog. Despite the fact that I’d seen the dog being put in its crate, my mother had witnessed it, and the dog walker they eventually hired always had to put the dog back in its crate after a walk — which was also witnessed by her two children who often accompanied her.
So, obviously my SIL’s “personal truth” was not based on reality. Even though she seemed to genuinely believe it. It really was the truth, according to her.
Was it the truth, though? No, not based on actual physical evidence and eyewitness accounts. Even my brother, in an email, admitted that the dog was in its crate for much of the day. It was only years later that he changed his version of “the truth”.
Eventually, the dog walker adopted the dog, which was much better for the poor animal.
However, my SIL continues to stick by her story, all evidence to the contrary.
Is this a problem?
For people who know her, it might be, since it’s obvious she is capable of gaslighting.
However, there are situations where a refusal to acknowledge the truth has much more serious consequences.
For example, if you are an engineer working on designing an airplane — what do you think the consequences might be if you decided that one plus one didn’t necessarily equal two? What if you decided that your personal truth told you it actually equaled three?
Would you be baffled if the plane crashed?
Would you consider yourself to blame? Or would you stick to your conception of the truth and remain puzzled? Would you try to prove your truth is the right one, and perhaps kill more people when the plane crashed again?
This is obviously a very simplistic and non-realistic example, but I think it makes a point. When it comes to physical reality, denying truth can lead to real-world tragedy.
I am fighting stage IV cancer. If you can help with medical bills, I would really appreciate it. Or if you enjoy my writing and would like to buy me a cup of coffee, that’s great too. Maybe someday I can return the favor.
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This post was previously published on MEDIUM.COM.
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