By Beleaf In Fatherhood
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Our family lovingly refers to Riah Beau as joy on a bulldozer. Lately, it feels like that bulldozer is operating with more of a punch than usual. We’ve always play fought, but I think it’s gotten out of hand and Riah seems like he has something to prove. In this vlog I talk Halloween 2020, Uriah’s wrist pain, raising boys to be better, and not using violence as a solution.
Transcript provided by YouTube:
00:02
all right let’s take a break huh
00:03
[Music]
00:10
hello hello hello look at me i’ve been
00:13
fresh i’ve been walking with my savior
00:14
yes i’m trying to do my best
00:16
guess i’m just a bag of bombs trying to
00:18
shake up by the flesh when you see me
00:19
never stress
00:20
when you see me see me see me you say
00:24
[Music]
00:26
for 10 years you’re proven to be the
00:28
greatest asset i could ever invest in
00:31
with uriah you help me understand that
00:34
joy is contagious
00:39
i want you to pay attention to a few
00:41
things here one
00:42
the time two the date
00:46
and three what the kids are wearing
00:50
these are their halloween costumes it is
00:53
5
00:53
47 in the morning and they have decided
00:56
that
00:57
down on sleep they want to be up
01:01
doing whatever it is that they want to
01:04
do
01:06
[Music]
01:10
now i want to differentiate between
01:12
bedtime and quiet time
01:14
bedtime is at night we say our prayers
01:16
brush our teeth
01:18
put the kids in bed and they go to sleep
01:21
that’s bedtime quiet time or a few hours
01:25
during the day
01:26
that you gotta be quiet that happens
01:28
during the day
01:29
after lunch and whenever they wake up to
01:32
about 7
01:33
30. a few days from then will be our
01:35
halloween party
01:36
it’ll be a small group of friends that
01:38
come together who celebrate
01:41
dress up no big deal but the kids got
01:43
new costumes they just had to try on
01:46
at 5 47 in the morning
01:50
now they made so much noise that they
01:52
woke me up
01:53
and this is what happened
02:06
why
02:17
out the window
02:22
you supposed to be having your face out
02:23
of the window at five o’clock in the
02:24
morning
02:26
why do you keep opening up the door
02:39
[Music]
02:47
go back to sleep is
02:50
bedtime it’s out of a quiet time
03:04
as a matter of fact give me points now
03:09
set a timer for a minute
03:13
30 seconds this is my new approach to
03:16
stern
03:17
discipline when the kids have a lot of
03:19
energy early in the morning
03:20
what we do is planks that way i have
03:22
their undivided attention and i can tell
03:24
them all the things i expect of them
03:26
and they can get some of that energy out
03:33
[Music]
03:42
when i was younger you said i want to be
03:43
a good father hold up wait a minute who
03:45
taught you
03:46
white friends saying names seem like
03:48
that last week they seen flying saucers
03:50
i ain’t really got too much to offer my
03:52
perspective i’m selected
03:54
with the method i’m directed with the
03:56
message most couldn’t mess with trying
03:57
to break a record with the people that i
03:59
mess with that’s balling
04:00
i ain’t got no time who calling hang up
04:02
dallas tell them imma call them back i
04:04
never will okay
04:05
i’m childish that’s a fallacy in me
04:08
and b you say i am too busy now i got
04:11
two more kids that’s crazy how you make
04:13
time
04:14
for what you want with your bro but you
04:15
want but you and everybody want the
04:17
sunshine
04:18
but you’re running but you’re running
04:19
but you’re running from the light man i
04:20
ain’t going live and running from the
04:21
mic
04:22
i ain’t really trying to be all up and i
04:23
hate cat man i ain’t never been attacked
04:25
nowadays that’s what everybody sounds
04:27
like i’m just trying to kick it with
04:28
just fathers
04:29
good moms good sons yeah good daughters
04:33
good god loved ones yeah sometimes
04:36
they get hard to show it if not
04:40
they will never know hold up wait you
04:43
ain’t even know it
04:44
you ain’t gotta be defined by your
04:45
purpose okay wait you ain’t
04:47
know it you don’t know it’s time you’re
04:49
worth it hold up wait you ain’t know it
04:51
it get way deeper than the surface hold
04:53
up wait you ain’t know
04:58
[Music]
05:17
hey fellas why are you guys excited huh
05:20
why are you excited
05:27
what do you think the surprise is theo i
05:30
think
05:36
i’ll show you guys don’t don’t open your
05:38
eyes yet
05:39
[Music]
05:40
after uriah hurt himself his mom and i
05:42
thought it would be a good idea for him
05:43
to take it
05:44
easy so we came up with some alternative
05:46
things that he can do
05:48
to have fun and to be safe
05:51
one thing that is always gonna make me
05:52
get a little fuzzy inside is watching
05:54
black boy joy watching my sons
05:58
enjoy things that i used to enjoy is
06:00
just the icing on the cake
06:02
and doing those things together makes it
06:05
even better
06:06
because you never know what can happen
06:07
when you apply teamwork i love to see
06:09
our children working together
06:11
but good things always come to an end
06:15
what happened what happened to the plane
06:18
i
06:19
swamped it theo how did ryan break it
06:26
i wasn’t watching him okay daniel
06:30
okay well raya here
06:47
to face and face with dad um if you tell
06:50
dad about this do not
06:52
do not tell him it was me because i have
06:54
been to that before
06:56
so can you help me
07:00
i just need help like i said as a father
07:03
it brings me joy to watch my children
07:05
work together
07:06
but that’s not always the case
07:13
these boys be 10
07:16
they be going at it and i know this is
07:19
partly my fault
07:20
but first let me explain there’s nothing
07:24
wrong with rough housing
07:25
i think all kids need that
07:30
we’ve kind of let this get out of hand
07:32
what’s starting his playful competition
07:34
is turned into more than that
07:36
emotions are getting involved and uriah
07:38
has a huge disadvantage because he has a
07:40
hurt wrist
07:41
so that’s gonna trigger him eventually
07:43
that’s because when he’s angry
07:45
he got the most strength but uriah has
07:48
something to prove
07:50
i’m not sure why he’s trying to prove it
07:52
but he needs
07:53
everyone to know even theo that he is
07:56
strong
07:57
he is just as big and powerful as his
07:59
brother
08:02
always do this brother yeah because
08:04
that’s why you should
08:05
feel it
08:08
and something like a little wrist injury
08:10
isn’t going to stop him from being
08:12
dominant
08:13
[Music]
08:18
in my observation of many moments i’ve
08:20
realized
08:21
that raya has a lot to prove and theo
08:25
has a limit
08:25
[Music]
08:36
now let’s talk about how we got here we
08:38
use the roughhouse all the time
08:40
and it was great because it was both of
08:41
them against me
08:43
now that i’ve been spending more time at
08:44
the office we haven’t been able to
08:46
roughhouse that much
08:48
but the testosterone is on the upswing
08:51
and they have
08:51
more energy to release so that leads
08:55
them to point toward each other
09:02
all right let’s take a break huh
09:08
[Music]
09:12
we have to fix this because we don’t
09:14
want our boys
09:15
operating out of anger and violence
09:19
we want that to be a recreational thing
09:21
not a solution to a disagreement
09:23
[Music]
09:25
look my dog do you know what’s gonna be
09:26
your biggest problem in life yeah
09:28
these hands do you know what’s gonna be
09:30
your biggest problem in life but once
09:36
again
09:37
this is probably my fault he hit you in
09:39
your hair
09:41
[Music]
09:48
one thing that we tried to implement was
09:50
teaching the kids
09:51
how to do chores hoping that them
09:54
working together
09:55
would actually strengthen both of them
09:57
help the household
09:58
and show them that they are better
10:01
together
10:01
no one told me it’d be this good
10:07
no one said i had this much fun with you
10:10
and that’s how you do it
10:11
theo they all told me about the hard
10:16
times
10:19
but they said nothing about the miracles
10:24
look it’s all good
10:25
[Music]
10:27
no matter what you make through it’s all
10:31
good
10:33
all the roses still take me through it’s
10:36
all good
10:38
it’s very good just know that you’re
10:40
right with me
10:42
it’s all good
10:43
[Music]
10:45
even if you have fights with me it’s all
10:49
good
10:51
you’re okay with me
10:54
you’re okay you’re
10:57
all right with me cause i’m
11:01
always and there’s nothing
11:04
you’ll ever do to push me away
11:09
i will be right here
11:12
i will
11:13
[Music]
11:27
how did this happen
11:30
um like i
11:34
was well i i
11:37
didn’t poke them i didn’t say you poked
11:40
it i said how did it happen
11:42
wait so who poked it
11:45
i only pick it up
11:48
i but one time i was sitting
11:51
on that chair and then i
11:54
had a dinosaur and then you stabbed it
11:58
with a dinosaur
12:00
it fought in my hand
12:08
so you poke the hole in which dinosaur
12:11
was it
12:13
i need you to pick up all these things
12:15
off the floor
12:19
oh look they’re almost look they’re
12:21
everywhere
12:23
look your brother’s getting them yeah
12:25
thank you your brother’s getting him
12:26
he’s putting him as well he’s eating
12:28
them
12:31
here
12:33
[Music]
12:37
get it out ah thank you
12:41
listen listen this is not good man
12:45
like you should be able to have stuff
12:46
for a long time you just got that chair
12:48
i love ryan’s curiosity sometimes
12:50
curiosity can put
12:52
us in rougher positions than we wanted
12:54
to be
12:55
uriah was curious about the insides of
12:57
his little poof ball
12:58
seat situation he poked a hole in it
13:01
with a dinosaur tail
13:03
uzi found the insides and was chewing on
13:06
whatever the inside was made of
13:08
i don’t want to limit his personality
13:10
but i have a feeling that whatever he’s
13:12
trying to prove
13:13
could potentially put him into danger
13:15
now telling him that
13:17
and still building him up is very
13:19
difficult
13:22
this is my journey to becoming a good
13:23
father and these
13:25
are my teachers
13:43
look what you did to me this is a
13:45
mystery don’t worry
13:56
[Music]
14:02
he got plans for you
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Photo credit: Screenshot from video
