What Do You See in the Mirror?

He said, “look in the mirror. Say I love you”.

“I can’t” I responded. “I’d rather not”.

“You can” he whispered. “Look in the mirror, and say I love you”, he repeated.

“I love you”, I said.

“What do you feel?” He asked.

“Empty. Alone. Hate. Pain. Suffering.” I responded.

“Do you love yourself?” he asked, already knowing the answer.

“Not at all,” I responded, feeling unlovable. Feeling like an absolute failure.

“Remember this feeling”, he said. “You will look back, and remember this day. Soon, you will look in the mirror and love what

you see”.

As I continued to look in the mirror, tears streamed down my face.

I was so lost. Everything worth anything to me was shattered. Anything that I appreciated was lost. I was a failure. I felt hopeless, alone, and tired of the fight.

I was just tired. I wanted freedom.

I was ready to quit. “I love you” felt like “You are worthless”.

That was the first conversation that my coach and I had. That conversation marked the starting point.

The path was not clear to me, but he knew the way. He had already been down the path. He was well on his own journey.

Now it was my time.

Looking back, that day was the best day of my new life. Without that day, that conversation, those tears, that pain, that emptiness…

Without acknowledging that pain, I would have never made the decision to begin to love myself.

Without loving myself, I have learned I can love no one the way they deserve.

We are designed to shine. We are designed to succeed. We are designed to love ourselves infinitely and unconditionally.

Until we do, we cannot truly love others infinitely and unconditionally.

We can only love others as much as we love ourselves. We might sacrifice. We might engage. We might give.

But we withhold… resentment, anger, disappointment.

Hurt people hurt people.

Others feel our pain. There are many names for a lack of love for ourselves…

depression, anxiety, lack of confidence, low self-esteem…

Call it whatever you want. But the root in all of them is a lack of love for ourselves, lack of confidence in our capabilities. That we are valuable. That we are worthy.

That we are enough.

You are enough. You might not feel it. But you are enough. I believe that

fully, without a doubt.

Do you feel it?

Now I look in the mirror. I love what I see. I see a beautifully designed, talented, purposeful, intelligent, wise, outgoing, energetic, loving, generous, gifted, authentic, passionate, genuine…

…perfectly imperfect, perfectly flawed human being.

I love myself unconditionally. I love myself infinitely.

The way my Creator intended.

You are worthy. Deserving. Valuable.

You are pure love and deserve to feel complete. You deserve to feel perfect.

How do you feel when you look in the mirror? What do you see? Who do you see? How do you feel?

Do you feel love?

No? Remember the feeling. It could be the last time you ever feel that way.

A version of this post was previously published on mikekitko.com and is republished here with permission from the author.

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