What Does It Take to Fall in Love?

What does it take to fall in love?

Is it:

a gorgeous smile?
a fit and athletic body?
confidence and charisma?
an amazing sense of humour?
a positive outlook on life?
similar hobbies, interests, goals and world views?

The list of what we’re attracted to goes on and on — and you should make an effort to develop these qualities. It’ll do a lot to spark that initial interest in you.

Yet, none of these qualities will make someone fall in love.

Your partner will only fall in love with you once you build an emotional connection.

How to create an emotional connection

I’d told three women I loved them, but I didn’t really know what that meant until the fourth.

With this woman, I was able to truly open up. I was able to be vulnerable. She did the same for me.

This creates the powerful and sacred emotional connection, which we often call ‘love’.

So, how do you build this? Well, it’s not quick or easy…

You need to learn about each other. You need to talk about things you’re too scared to reveal to others. Childhood dreams. Adulthood fears. Your biggest ambitions. Your deepest regrets. Let no stone go unturned.

If you’ve had your heart broken, you might feel the need to pull back. You may want to filter yourself. Don’t do it. Reveal your true self. Be vulnerable.

This is tremendously difficult, because you’re trusting your partner with your emotions. If this trust is betrayed, it takes a long time to heal.

You’re taking risks when you open up your heart. It’s scary, but it’s necessary.

It’s completely natural to put up walls and show someone what you think they want to see. But, by doing so, you obstruct the path to a true emotional connection. When this path is blocked, you become nothing more than the next hot guy or girl.

Is that all you want?

Dare to risk everything for true love

It’s incredibly painful to open your heart only for your partner to take a huge dump inside it.

That’s what happened to me. Four times now.

But I’d dare to do it again, because I know it’s worth the risk.

When you create this strong emotional connection, you give each other something unique. You give each other something more desirable than the coolest, sexiest guy or girl standing at the bar.

Deep down, this emotional connection is what we all want more than anything.

So, I dare you to show vulnerability to your partner — and encourage them to do the same.

When they do, take the time to listen, empathise and truly understand the person in front of you. This is how you gain someone’s trust. Make sure to take care of it.

This type of love is sacred. It’s powerful. It’s overwhelming. If you can keep it burning strong, it’ll make you happier than anything else.

Surely that’s worth the risk?

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This post was previously published on Hello, Love and is republished here with permission from the author.
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