Ignoring Warning signs is what I used to excel at. If it was uncomfortable or I was a bit scared of what it could lead to then I would just sweep it under the rug and hope it disappeared.
Spoiler alert: That’s a really, really bad idea
I want to ask you some questions.
How can you tell if something in your job feels ‘off’ for you?
How long do you leave it before you realize it’s not just a ‘bad day / week / month’?
How do you figure out what the problem is?
I want you to answer that as fully as you can for YOU.
Everyone will have different answers, there is no right answer, and the only wrong answer is if you answer what people THINK or SAY it SHOULD be.
I’m going to let the cat out of the bag here….
I used to have the mindset of just ignoring it, or just keep pushing through… that didn’t work out too well for me.
I had been through a lot, death of a loved one, two surgeries for skin cancer, Covid-19 and the chaos that caused, new baby and more.
From January 2019 to late 2021 I felt completely lost both at work, in myself, as a husband and as a parent.
One of the main reasons for that was because I ignored that feeling of something not being right, and when I didn’t ignore it, I then took no action.
For me, I was hampered by visa restrictions, so I couldn’t just go and find another job even if I wanted to.
So my solution to knowing something wasn’t right was to just count down the days until I could do something about it.
It seemed logical at the time.
Mentally switch off, try not to think too much, other people have it worse, you can get through this, just get through the next hour and the next then you can come home, then it’s one day closer to the weekend etc etc.
In hindsight that was a terrible path to go down.
What I hadn’t realized at the time was that it’s not really possible to live that way for 10 hours a day 5 days a week, and then arrive home super excited and ready for the kids.
It’s doable at times and in short bursts.
But long term?
No chance!
Being in the wrong job, or the wrong career, or working with the ‘wrong’ team can happen to all of us.
We can make an error and pick the wrong job. We can have circumstances change for us through none of our doings.
It’s not your fault if that happens to you.
But don’t do what I did and ignore it or switch off.
Your kids need you and want you.
They NEED their real parent
Your partner needs and wants the REAL you
You need the REAL you as well.
Back to my original questions:
How can you tell if something in your job feels ‘off’ for you?
How long do you leave it before you realize it’s not just a ‘bad day / week / month’?
How do you figure out what the problem is?
What action will you take?
Cheering you on,
Dan
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Internal image courtesy of author
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Previously Published on danquinlan.com and is republished on Medium.
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Photo credit: iStock
