When $500K Was Stolen from Me, I Thought My Life Was Over

I got married at 25, and started building my family right away. Within 18 months, our first baby came, and by the time I was 40, I had five little boys with more kids on the way. My wonderful wife was a SAHM, I was hustling, my business was flourishing, and I felt on top of the world.

Work consisted of a small technology company focused on mobile development and deployments. This was back in 2007, when Blackberry and Windows phones were all the rage, and the iPhone was just being announced. My customers consisted of some of the most popular Fortune 500 companies around: Nokia, Microsoft, Disney, Lockheed Martin, Boeing, and the US Navy, to name a few.

I woke up early, ran to the office, worked 10-hour days, and came home exhausted. I did what was necessary to keep my wife at home and provide for my children. The fact that I rarely saw them at all was not even a problem I registered on my radar.

Evidently, I was so busy doing business that I didn’t even notice I was being financially catfished by one of my suppliers. One day, I woke up, went to work, and $500,000.00 was gone. All my profits, all my business investment, all my efforts, all my equity. Poof.

He ended up in jail, but I ended up on my couch. And there I stayed for days, which stretched into weeks. I couldn’t get up. I couldn’t face my family, my employees, the world. And I especially couldn’t face Gd. Everything was gone — how could He do this to me? My wife tried to console me. My children tried to make me happy. My successful friends let me know that “this too shall pass.” Even my wise father encouraged me to get back on the horse and keep riding. Nothing helped.

But the bills weren’t going to pay themselves, so eventually, like every decent man, I peeled myself off the couch and headed back to work. However, I did so a changed man. I was done with the rat race, the constant hustle, and mainly, with missing my children’s upbringing.

So instead of running to the office first thing in the morning, I made my wife and children breakfast every day — spelt waffles from scratch, eggs, and fresh juice. I started doing carpool and connecting with my kids. I took the summers off and taught my kids how to waterski and wakeboard as my father did for me. I came home early and read my children bedtime stories. I started hanging out with old friends and made new ones. I trained for a 5K race, and did great!

Eventually, I decided to go back to school and get my therapy license, and have been loving work, helping other men reconnect with their wives and children. And I started connecting with Gd again. But not from a place of wanting anything from Him but serving Him instead.

These are the best years of my life, focused on my marriage, my children, my community, my clients, and Gd. Years I would have missed spending my time at the office. And to think, this gift was brought to me by a financial catfisher who stole my life’s savings but, in reality, saved my life (I should thank him in person as he is getting out of jail soon!).

A fool learns from his own mistakes, while a wise man learns from others. I bless you that you take my story to heart and invest your time and energy in what counts in life now, rather than having to peel yourself off the couch, like me!

—

This post was previously published on medium.com.

***