How to avoid going home with a car you’ll end up wanting to drive off a cliff.
The last vehicle I bought I fell in love with in a showroom window and bought on impulse. The salesman rattled on while giving me a mini test ride, so it wasn’t until I drove the car home that I realized that, though the price was right, I’d really been had.
No, it wasn’t a lemon, but it did leave a sour taste. The seats had poor support; when I climbed out after even a two-hour drive, my ass was numb and my lower back felt stiff. The steering was too light. Parking was a chore—I could never see my back end. And when I had passengers, everyone other than six-year-olds felt like sardines in a can.
I kept the car till I’d paid it off, hauling it in for service more often than I’d hoped. One day, while waiting for work to be done, I went out for a beer and was soon joined by a guy I recognized as one of the mechanics. I bought him a beer, then another.
The more beers we had, the looser his tongue got. “Don’t quote me, for chrissake!” he kept saying. I told him I probably would but promised not by name. I said I’d call him Sal, then took furious notes on a pile of napkins as he talked.
“Kicking the tires won’t cut it,” he said. “Before you buy, you gotta give a car a ‘fitness test’—try it on to see if it really fits.” Below, minus most of his colorful language, are questions Sal says you have to answer before signing a sales order.
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1. Is it comfortable? A car seat shouldn’t feel like a cushy sofa; it should firmly support your back, shoulders, and thighs. “And always crawl into the rear,” he urges. “If your knees hit the back of the front seat, or you have to scrunch to keep from hitting the ceiling, think how your passengers are gonna feel.”
Also: Does seat shape and adjustability favor the shotgun passenger, as well as the driver? Is there enough head and leg room? Are handles, buttons, and knobs easily reached and worked? Is there a place for elbows? Will the steering wheel raise, lower, and tilt with changing driver needs?
2. Safety is not just air bags, seat belts, good tires, and non-skid brakes, Sal pointed out. It’s adjustable anti-whiplash headrests; cushioned dashboards, door panels, and ceilings; knobs and handles recessed to avert injury in a crash; plus appropriate, not confusing, pedal placement.
It’s also good lighting, so maps and road directions can be deciphered at night in areas where your GPS may fail.
3. Visibility means being able not only to see over the hood but also the rear and sides of the car through mirrors (and, in some models now, camera images). And, to park safely—lacking an electronic warning system—it means being able to see the cars’ extremities without popping up to roof height, bobbing your head out the driver’s window, or twisting uncomfortably in your seat.
Also: Are mirrors properly placed and easily adjusted? Can you see over the steering wheel, or do you have to peer through its spokes to view the road? Must you do an eyes-right every time you want to work the window controls, door locks, radio, music system, GPS screen, heating and air-conditioning knobs? Or are controls placed so conveniently that only a kind of motorist Braille is needed?
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4. Security goes hand and hand with safety. Although your home may have a garage, you should be security-minded if you ever hope to park curbside or in some parking facility.
Also: Do anti-theft devices come with the car? Is central locking a standard feature? How secure is the glovebox, fuel tank, luggage compartment, and hood? What system exists to safeguard the onboard, computer, radio, CD player, and GPS?
5. Storage does involve, first of all, the glovebox, which in recent years has been shrinking and, in some models vanishing. Can it hold whatever you need to lock away?
Also: Are there places for mug, maps, and coins for toll roads? Is the trunk of the car or the rear compartment of the van or SUV big or small, and shaped so clumsy loads can be slid in easily? If you have to haul anything sizable, will back seats fold down so trunk storage extends into the passenger compartment?
Here’s another down ‘n dirty tip from Sal: “If you usually haul the same bags when you take a trip, bring them to the showroom with you—empty, of course. That may piss off your salesman, but it’s the only way to see if they fit.”
6. Handling. It’s subjective, so in Sal’s words, “Don’t let some dumb-ass car dealer con you. Do your own road test.” Why? To make sure comfort and visibility factors coalesce with the car’s performance and your ability to deal with it.
Note the responsiveness—steering, accelerating, braking. You won’t need 400 horsepower to drive at posted speed limits but should have nimble pickup to maneuver in and out of traffic and on and off expressways confidently. And as you drive, do you feel at one with the car and in complete control? What about turning ease and riding comfort—on various surfaces?
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All these factors should influence your buy/no buy decision, for each affects how well the vehicle will serve your needs and how effective you’ll be when driving it. “Don’t let some son-of-a-bitch sales manager rush you,” Sal cautioned, “you know, with bullshit like, ‘you gotta sign the order right now or I can’t hold the price.’ Take your time and give every car you like a thorough shakedown.”
“I call it an auto enema,” he chuckled as I plunked down cash for his third beer.
Looking back, I think Sal’s points are worth much more than a few drinks. For no matter how much you spend on a new car, it’s bound to impact your budget. So whatever you buy or lease should “fit” perfectly and feel good the moment you slide behind the wheel.
Great article. I wish I had this information when I bought my first car. I will definetly use it next time. Also, a big thank you from my sister who used the information when she was looking for her new car. She said she would have never bought the car that she picked out without using the information.
Wish I had read this article years ago when I was totally lost in buying a car. Good advise!
Thanks Merv.
Thorough and practical advice for every car buyer. If I had had an article like this to help me, I could have probably saved myself and my dad, in my youth, a few bucks and a lot of headaches. The thing is, we all know or sense this good advice, but to see it all orderly and in print, and easy and enjoyable to read, is a real pleasure. Thank you Merv. Well done.
The checklist provides details that you cannot find elsewhere. Wish that I had had this when I recently purchased my car. Will download it for future use and hope that you do future articles in the same vein.
What a timely article – given that we’re “in the market”. We were showroom dazzled by the last car we bought, and thus did not pay proper attention to handling, braking, wind noise, etc., as the test ride was quite cursory. Thanks for this imput – we’ll put it to good use.
Just purchased my Volvo in May and while I am very happy with it, I wish i had this checklist and Sal with me. Nothing can make you more insecure than an auto showroom.
Thank you Sal! I’m glad the chance encounter led to such great advice. Especially timely since I’m shopping for a car right now.
Great stuff. Love the idea of pakcing your luggage in a car before you buy it.
Thanks for the great article on buying a car. Wish I’d read this before “helping” my wife with her last car purchase. What a debacle! Is Sal available to help the Mrs. next time around?
This is useful information and good advice about car buying. People don’t generally think car purchases through this way but they really should. Cars are just about second to homes when it comes to major consumer purchases. To be sure, a good checklist for anyone in the automobile market.
I wish I’d met Sal when I bought my Toyota Matrix. I was thinking “economy” when I should have been thinking “practicality” and “comfort.” And I wouldn’t have to worry about reccalls.
Very useful piece. Though I’m happy with my Honda Accord, it would have been helpful to read this before I shopped.
With one car purchase or another over the years, I have struggled with all of the deficiencies mentioned in Buying A Car 101. Some of these faults were so obvious in concept, that I wondered how these cars were okayed while still on the drawing board, no less allowed off the lot. Terrific checklist, one I will carry with me the next time I even think about a new car.
What a great checklist! Thanks to that honest (if slightly lit) mechanic for his professional tips, I’m going to copy this out to have handy when I shop for my new car next year.