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Deception is not a pretty subject. When we think about delving into the subject of deception, there are no warm and fuzzy feelings that rise to the surface. Just the word itself can make us feel uncomfortable. Being deceived can leave us feeling used, disturbed, drained, angry, even rebellious. While it’s not my favorite subject, I’ve learned that it is an important subject, and it has much to teach us.
Deceive is defined as “to mislead or falsely persuade others; to mislead by false appearance or statement.” Deception comes from the Latin de meaning “from” and capere, meaning “to take”. The phrase “take someone for a ride” is a way of describing deception. Most of us have been deceived at some point in our lives; and yet, there is a silver lining if we stop and look more deeply.
“Every adversity, every failure, every heartache carries with it the seed of an equal or greater benefit.”
~Napoleon Hill
The Root Of Deception
What is at the root of deception? Why does one person deceive another? Why do we deceive ourselves? I believe at the root of deception is a false sense of powerlessness. When one feels empowered within one’s self, there is no need to mislead, lie, and hide behind deceptive acts. When one feels that the only way that they can have what they want is through false pretenses; and they are self-motivated enough to pursue that ultimate dead end, they engage in deception.
“The most important persuasion tool you have in your entire arsenal is integrity.”
~Zig Ziglar
Dealing With Deception
How do we deal with deception? I have come to know that every challenging experience, including deception, has something to teach us. When we find ourselves in a situation where we’ve been deceived, we can stop, be gentle with ourselves, process the experience, unravel it, transform any negative emotions, contemplate what the experience has to teach us, and then move on. If we find ourselves on the receiving end of deception, it can teach us to become even more discerning about who we give our time, energy, devotion, or money to. It’s important to honor your feelings and also be able to move out of feeling stuck or victimized. Otherwise, we can spend weeks, months or even years trapped in deception’s web.
“Never blame anyone in your life. Good people give you happiness. Bad people give you experience. Worst people give you a lesson, and the best people give you memories.”
~Anonymous
I believe that every good action, when done as a selfless service, goes into a spiritual bank account. When we are giving and serving from our hearts, we are adding to our spiritual bank account. And, if you are following your dharma—right action, and still find yourself in a situation where you are being deceived by someone, I believe that your good deeds were not in vain. Ultimately, I believe in the Golden Rule.
“Love thy neighbor as thyself. The rest is mere commentary.”
~Yehuda Berg
I wrote a song, “Hearts Breakdown” that relates to this experience, and I’d like to share it with you here.
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Lyrics to “Hearts Breakdown”
Never ending care
And in need of repair
It’s a timeless affair
Hearts Breakdown
Many sleepless nights
When there’s no wrong or right
It’s a murderous fight
Hearts Breakdown
Love, love
Ain’t nothing gonna change it
No, no
Only hope to rearrange it
So, so
Better get used playing a game that isn’t fair
Born to battle with a fragile heart
Torn and tattered from the start
Nobody said it would be this hard
Hearts Breakdown
Hush my darlin’ said don’t you cry
I’d hold you close but my hands are tied
God only knows all the reasons why
Hearts Breakdown
It’s a high that you get
From a lit cigarette
It’s the worst kind of bet
Hearts Breakdown
Like a shot in the dark
How can you hit the mark
When there’s fire with no spark
Hearts Breakdown
Love, love
Ain’t nothing gonna change it
No, no
Only hope to rearrange it
So, so
Better get used playing a game that isn’t fair
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Photo: Pexels
Definitions: Dictionary.com, Vocabulary.com