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When we experience trauma, we’re forever changed. However, it is possible to heal and recover. The first step is recognizing that we’ve been through a traumatic experience and identifying how we cope. In this post, we’ll explore what trauma is and the ways that men may process it.
What is trauma?
According to the American Psychological Association, trauma is an event or experience to an incredibly stressful or horrible event. There are many different types of traumatic experiences, but some common ones include:
- Physical abuse
- Sexual abuse
- Emotional abuse
- War or combat
- Car accidents
- Death of a loved one
Not everyone who experiences a traumatic event develops PTSD. And Experts are starting to understand why this is. However, things like being a child at the time of the event and having little social support after the event seem to be risk factors.
5 ways men process trauma
Trauma is different for everyone. Therefore, each person might process it differently–regardless of their gender. However, there are some common ways that men tend to cope with the emotions that follow a traumatic event. Here are just a few.
1. Substance use
After a traumatic event, it’s common to have lots of intense, uncomfortable emotions. For many people, coping with these feelings can be too painful. Instead of confronting the emotions, people may use drugs or alcohol to numb the pain.
Men who’ve survived trauma might develop other addictions, too. Internet addiction, video game addiction, and gambling are other ways men might try to cope.
2. Impulsive decisions
While some people turn to substances to cope with the difficult emotions following trauma, others engage in risky behaviors. Driving fast or recklessly, having unprotected intercourse with multiple partners, and impulsive spending are just a few examples.
According to this trauma therapist training, by engaging in these behaviors, people can temporarily avoid the pain caused by their trauma. However, this is only a short-term solution. The emotions don’t go away–instead, they may only grow more intense over time.
3. Overworking
Overworking is another way that men may avoid intense feelings following trauma. Instead of sitting with your emotions, you might pour yourself into your job. Taking on extra projects and working longer hours occupies your mind so you don’t have to think about what happened.
Again, this works in the moment. However, avoiding your emotions won’t help you heal in the long run.
4. Anger
After repressing emotions for so long, they’re bound to come out at some point. Oftentimes, people may express their pain in explosive, misdirected ways–especially if they haven’t had the ability or opportunity to process it.
This can take the form of constant irritability, road rage, yelling, or even physical violence. People may be more likely to have these reactions when feeling triggered by something that reminds them or their traumatic experience.
5. Shame and blame
Anger is usually directed at others. However, some men who’ve experienced trauma also feel bad about themselves. They might worry that their trauma is their fault, or blame themselves for the traumatic event.
Remember, trauma is never your fault, even if you feel that way. No one deserves to experience trauma, no matter the circumstances.
Get in Touch with a Therapist
If you are experiencing any of these symptoms you should consider hiring an experienced trauma therapist. They can help you work through these feelings and get you in a better place. It’s not a sign of weakness to go to therapy, it’s a sign of strength and self-care.
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This content is brought to you by Grady Jones
Photo by Nik Shuliahin 💛💙 on Unsplash