Priorities always give the feeling of confidence. To be treated at priority, boosts self-confidence and ego. To be an object of someone’s love or desire gives an edge over the others. And so even in case of trying to get love, everyone loves to be loved at first rather than waiting with patience for having it with time. To be first choice, first attention or someone’s first love is something that becomes more important than the person whose attention is supposed to be craved.
Love takes place in confusion and gets lost in maturity. We meet people, like them, date them, love them, and get committed. Slowly with time and the issues of life and love we move out of them. Love withers. We move and make new memories, prepare ourselves to love someone again. The cycle of love thus continues.
May be, I am not comfortable with the moving on thing. I am not ok being the “first person”, with the idea of loving again and again or getting accepted and rejected and continuing this vicious circle of love. May be what I want is to be happy and be with someone who feels happy with me. But this happiness should not be for a particular time period, it should be as long as our existence prevails. I want to be in an aura of love where emotions and feeling exists, where love is valued and felt and should not come only as a part and parcel that is attached with relationship tag. I don’t want to be someone who is tried and tested and if found a better one, is refused or rejected. I would love to bend in love but not be a changed and different person in love. I and ready to be the last option in the life of the relation I will have in my life.
To the ones who may enter to my life,
“Let me be the last option of your life. Let me be the one whom you consider and choose to be with after experiencing the different shades of love. Let me be the one who concludes your beginning, who finishes your search and who completes you. The one to whom you seek redemption, peace and relaxation, when you realize you do not want to search anymore and you want to not just try but get settled down with.
There is a reason and a rationale behind this thought. Because somewhere deep inside me, I don’t want to be the first person, anyone come and resort to for help. Nor the first one whom you think of when you want to laugh, when you want to share your sorrows, when you want some help or even when you think of settling down.
We as humans are greedy by nature. We always crave for more and better when we get something. We accept it for time being and hope for a better version of it. And so, if and when you settle with me first, you have not seen the world, you have not seen the cruelty, the rudeness and the harshness of the society. Also you have not seen the extent to which you can be loved and understood, what type of people you can be compatible with and what type of experiences you can have in your relationship. We met each other and fell in love, what love you received or saw was what I delivered and that you considered as of paramount level.
You pass years with me and on a random Sunday walk by the road side you see love flourishing between a couples in a way you have not seen. On your journey of life, you will meet and see friends, lovers, families all there happily enjoying love in a unique way which you have never seen and you will feel regret thinking that you could have got this, only if you would have not settled with me at first in your life.
I don’t want to be that regret. I don’t want myself be the pity, you feel for yourself. I don’t want the reason for your not being exposed to the world, to the types of relations, to the different love and sufferings. I want you go out live the life you wish to live, with others. Share the moments with others, pass the time, share a trust and experience everything. And in this experience, feel the love you want to have. And then if you will realize and find that life you want to get settled with, from someone else; be happy to go there.
But in case you find me somewhere on the path and feel that it is me the one who can be with you for seasons to come; I will be waiting. Because now you might have had understood my importance and it is very much possible that you will not leave me. You will stick to the thick and thin of life. You might ignore the small petty issues because you might no longer give them or treat them as something of great importance. Fights will be a part of the particular day and will not be extended to the whole life, arguments done in an hour will be treated and cured instead of continuously nagging on them. Now you will not compare me with anyone. You might avoid thinking of better or worse and somehow now with your whole heart and mind and with a genuine love you will end up with this last option as the best option and first option of you upcoming beautiful life.”
The Last Option
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