Romancing the spouse is about more than foreplay in the bedroom.
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Many men are unsure of what our spouses find romantic, and we are afraid of looking silly. Men have a hard time with rejection so it is no surprise that most of us avoid romance and foreplay like the plague because we don’t want to face the dreaded, “No…not tonight” catastrophe!
Well, help is on the way! Woo Hoo!
Below are nine great tips and ideas on how to be romantic, without worry of a rejection:
Tip 1: Spend some time cuddling
Initiating foreplay and being romantic with your wife can be as easy as just showing a little emotion. Yes, women love the tough guy, but they also like the guy who can cuddle and give passionate kisses. Time should be important to us all because once it is gone we can never get it back. Spending time with your wife tells her that she is priceless to you. Just relaxing and being with each other can be very romantic. Try cuddling while watching a movie or your favorite television show. Afternoon naps during the weekend are a great way to get in some cuddle time and maybe…just maybe you’ll get a little naughty time.
Tip #2: Have a date with her
Remember before you got married how you would take her out to that nice little restaurant and then to go see a movie? Do that again. She will love that you remember where some of your dates took place. The early years of your relationship are important to her, and reenacting them will show her they are important to you as well. Calling her at work and setting up a date time will give her something to look forward to after work.
Tip #3: Give her a little gift
A great way to romance your wife while she is at work is by sending her a small gift…a “just because you love her” gift. Yes, come on tough guy…you can do it! Forget your pride sometimes okay! Your buddies don’t have to know anything! Have flowers, candy or fruit delivered while she is at work. This small gift will brighten her day and make her feel extra special. She will feel like the most important woman in the world. And believe me when I say this–she will remember it when she sees you later on that evening! Boom shaka boom shaka….okay, enough of that! Next tip please.
Tip #4: Help with home duties
Giving her one weekend to herself will benefit the both of you in the end. Offer to clean the house and watch the kids while she gets a massage and does some shopping with her girlfriends. She will love having some time to herself and appreciate you stepping in to help. Casually suggest that she should pick something out for the evening. This may get her in the mood and have her excited to come to see you.
Tip #5: Cook for her
A recent survey of working women was conducted and it was found that 95% of them dread cooking a full blown meal and then doing the dishes after a long day of work. Look…I know you have also had a long day at work but if want some of that “sweet potato pie”, you sometimes have to go an extra step.
Try cooking one of her favorite meals. If cooking is not your forte, order dinner and dessert from your favorite take outs or restaurants. She will absolutely love not having to cook. After dinner help her with the dishes. Working together can be very romantic for her. She will appreciate your help, and it will allow time for small talk and some fun flirting.
Tip #6: Take a walk
Taking evening walks on the beach or even just around the block can be romantic. Beaches are a great spot to do some star-gazing as well. While walking hold her hand, and pull her in for kisses now and then. Dancing under the moonlight or in the bedroom to some sexy music is a great way to turn her on and relax her. She will forget all about her boring day, and be all about you.
Tip #7: A hot bath
Taking a hot bath will relax and arouse both of you. Lighting some candles and turning off the lights will only make the experience better. Have wine glasses and chilled wine next to the tub. She will feel like she is at an elegant resort. While she is relaxing in the tub, now is the perfect time to get the bedroom ready.
Okay, I may get a lot of flack from some of you and you may want me to turn in my “man card” but I’m telling you that this stuff works! While she is still in the tub relaxing, set out some of her favorite lingerie on the bed. Women love this sort of stuff…trust me! You picking out her lingerie will arouse her even more and who knows….probably she will tease you with a little strip show with her lingerie. Now is the perfect time to offer her a back massage or foot massage. The power of touch is your secret weapon!.
Here’s a HUGE secret! All of the nerves of the entire body runs along the bottom of the feet. Feet are very sensual. Massage her soles firmly but not too hard starting in the middle then to the right and then to the left in a circular motion while talking and making her laugh. This will get her juices flowing and she will become incredibly relaxed and aroused. She’ll be putty in your hands.
Tip #8: Be caring
Last but not least, one of the basic human needs is caring. We all need to be cared for, and we crave it. Most of us do not want to admit it, but being cared for helps us feel loved and complete. When romancing your wife, it is important to do things because you really do care. She will instantly notice a fake or half-hearted attempt. Do not romance her because you want to bang the heck out of her (although this may be your only purpose). Instead..have the right mindset and romance her because you want to!
Tip #9: Play hookie from work
Play hookie from work and just spend the day together. Go sightseeing in a town that is unfamiliar to the both of you. This is a great way to find a great place you never knew existed. Stop at an unknown restaurant and have lunch. She will feel naughty for skipping work to be with you and enjoy your spontaneity.
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Photo: AK Rockefeller/Flickr
Having sex without foreplay? I thought it was not good. Enjoy sex with your partner, and it will improve the quality of your sex.
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Sex with a woman is like 85% foreplay. However one achieves such depends on them, their SO, their desires…but sex without foreplay is like chocolate chip cookies without milk. Doable, but not nearly as good.
End result … “sex.” Why does it always have to have a connection with sex? Romance is romance and it doesn’t have to result in sexual intercourse, does it? all that you mentioned are loving romantic actions that are great but again, they are things that don’t have to end up with inetrcourse, do they?
Tom B: End result … “sex.” Why does it always have to have a connection with sex? Romance is romance and it doesn’t have to result in sexual intercourse, does it? >>> Tom, you should keep more of an eye on what’s going on with the young ‘uns, these days. They got asexuals, aromantics…the whole gamut. I’m sure you could find something that you like. But generally speaking it’s all about our species hard-wired desire to create the next gen. Like Socrates said – the good thing about being an old is that the little head does’t tell the big… Read more »
Hunky Monkey, You’re writing did manage to put a smile on my face. I do keep an eye on the “young ‘uns” and what I’m seeing are a couple of generations now losing out on a lot of great life’s experiences because they concentrate on “sex.” there is so much more to be had. Socrates underestimated human capabilities and so do many today. underestimate the capability of self mastery that a young man has. I guess my being saner and pious is a compliment? I would have to debate the pious part though. Many years ago when I was dating,… Read more »
Good point, Tom.
Foreplay for sex, romantic (or caring gestures) absolutely do not have to be tied directly to sex (in my opinion). They are just the little things that keep the love alive, the relationship strong. The end result, in my experience, is better sex, but there is an indirect relationship there, as you’ve stated.