When the Right Questions Are Asked

As we stand gazing at the path, our uncertainty stifles progress. Some questions keep us stuck, plain and simple. Knowing the difference between productive questions and stagnant ones motivates a decisive change. In today’s world, we can find answers quickly, and still we need to figure out if an answer is truly needed.

“If an interesting question pops into one’s mind, one can research it immediately and from multiple sources, rather than visit the library tomorrow or next week” Ronald D. Vale, NIDA

Consider the fork in the road. Usually, it means a choice, a challenge to move in a new direction or to stand somewhat in an aimless, confused way. Hesitation is the death of personal growth if you use it as your only go-to decision-making.

However, hesitation can assist us by pausing while we consider the next steps. It also helps people not unintentionally fall off a cliff while visiting Arches National Park in beautiful Utah. (I’ve been there, and thankfully I didn’t fall off the cliff). What about a bridge to nowhere? Ever feel like you can’t move forward, and going back makes things worse? Me, too.

So, what do we do if we find conflict between movement and hesitation?

The question

A well-asked question garners a thought-provoking introspection. We can dig deep if the right question is asked or mess up something special if we ask or ponder a question that has no lasting merit.

Ask yourself when coming upon a divided path, “Will finding an answer change the fact of your current situation? Will it improve where you stand today, or will it generate more questions, some you don’t want to ask, let alone find an answer?”

We have reasons we do things, stating facts, generating new ideas, or participating in different activities. No one is exempt from a reason for their existence. However, some people never seem to be satisfied with who they are at any given moment.

Hesitation can assist us by pausing while we consider the next steps.

“It is easier to judge the mind of a man by his questions rather than his answers.” — Pierre-Marc-Gaston, duc de Lévis (1764–1830)

The purpose behind the question

When we know or understand the purpose behind what we ask enhances what we already know, it also holds us back or keeps us stuck. Forward movement doesn’t have to include a backward glance unless you check your patterns.

If you look back long enough to remember mistakes and repetitive patterns of negative behaviors, stop yourself from repetition, then take a gander and see what you can find. These mental checkups help us maneuver life’s events with clarity rather than the murky world of confusion.

Consider the scene out your rearview mirror: specific, helpful, and behind you. When a person looks back, they tend to spot traffic, cars that speed upon their tail, when they press their brakes to make sure no one is behind them, and when they want to cross to another lane. You can back up using the mirror, so oncoming traffic is noticed, and you’ll be able to drive in the direction you originally wanted.

The purpose is to help guide you forward safely and directly. Helpful, right?

When a person continues to make the same mistakes and not learn from them, they tend to gaze out of the rearview mirror of life. Constantly comparing the negative experiences, fears, or frustrations with yesterday’s traffic (events, dramas, pains, losses).

If the same mistakes generate the same patterns, you’ll never progress past the painful repeat performances meant to keep you stuck. Dreadful and lonely breeds stuck and discouraged emotions.

About the questions you ask

The moments where life blossoms into joyful experiences enhance the view forward. While the experience of asking questions might garner you an idea into a bright, promising future, the wrong questions tend to lead you astray. Usually, a stuck mindset builds a confused focus rather than an awareness meant to guide.

Experience brings us to a space of ‘being’ present rather than the need to do something. The questions we ask sometimes keep us moving rather than relishing the current moment. In a state of awareness, we can be present without expectations.

“Perspective is as simple as answering this question: If I had five months to live would I experience this problem differently?” — Shannon Alder

Allowing acceptance to flow through us as life presents itself is fully empowering.

The car’s front view and the expansive windshield focus on the broad, open, and subjective choices available in directional shifts. If we go through life with a potential positive focus, we openness embraces the upcoming moments. The optimism around us increases, people tend to pick up on it, and the energy feels fantastic. The adventure of “next” gives us hope, a bit of variety, and is full of creative possibilities.

The rearview mirror tends to remain stunted, and the smallness reduces vision. Remember, no one plans for yesterday. If tomorrow could be changed before it arrived, would that change the way you do things?

Tomorrow is a vast open canvas you get to explore.

Yesterday was stuck, stagnant, and immobile.

The next hour is full of possibilities.

It’s your choice

We can move in several directions and make choices for whatever outcome we desire to make. If we choose to ask questions, we will need to face the answers. Every answer might not please us; they might destroy hope or even stunt our goals.

“Reflect upon your present blessings, of which every man has plenty; not on your last misfortunes, of which all men have some.” — Charles Dickens

While you look at your life, whether you begin to notice your backward glances or not, take time to think about your purpose. Once you know your “why,” you’ll have a better chance at navigating the questions, which come up throughout your day. Then, take the time to answer them or shelf the question. It doesn’t hurt to let some things go.

~Just a thought by Pamela

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Previously Published on medium

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