It’s sometimes hard to know what you’re supposed to really do with you become a parent. “What role should I be playing”, “how can I support my partner”, “how can I be a great parent”; They are often questions that whirl around in our minds and we just hope that we are doing a good job. These things don’t always come naturally to men (and woman) so here are a few things you should be doing as a man to support your family and be there for your children.
Men should provide.
When you see this, I bet you initially thought– financial. I don’t mean financially; men should provide for their families across all areas of life. Supporting your family financially is huge and a massive help, so if you are doing that– well done, but we also want fathers to provide time, help and support with the children. These aspects are equally, if not more important that financial providing. This will allow your partner to feel supported and like you are working as a team. Your children will love the extra time and support they get from Dad, and it will positively impact the whole family. If you have the opportunity to have a flexible/ Family friendly job- embrace that. Get home at a decent time to provide some quality time with your family and then log back on and finish a few things once the children go to bed.
Men should be present with their family.
When you get home from work switch off from work life and be fully present with your family. Coming home from work and sitting on your phone or laptop isn’t being present with your family- you might as well have stayed in the office! When you get home, put your devices away. See if your partner needs help cooking dinner, play with the children and help with their homework. Having an hour or 2 of quality time with your children will really help with your relationship and you will feel uplifted and happy to have that time with them too.
Men should Praise their family.
Often, we take things for granted in life and our expectations of what should be done are relatively high. Tell your partner how much you appreciate her and praise her for all the things she does for you and your family. The same goes with your children. We often focus on the negative behaviours that we forget to praise the good. Positive reinforcement is a marvellous tool with children of all ages- praise them when they do something good and take notice when they are behaving really well. Tell them often how proud you are of them and praise them for good behaviour- it will encourage a whole lot more of it.
Men should play with their family.
This may seem obvious, but playing with your children is a great tool to strengthen your bond and to build more trust and respect. Be consistent with your children. When they are little make a point of playing with them every day with their favourite toy or reading them a book etc. As your children get older try to continue encouraging a playful relationship. Play board games or football outside, anything that creates engagement with your children. We are in a society where children are growing up with a whole lot of technology, so spending time with your children and communicating with them is going to help them no end in their futures I still joke around with my parents as an adult, and I love that we have that relationship.
Men should see themselves as equal to their partner.
Gone are the days when the man goes to work, and the woman stays at home. Even if this is the case treat your partner as an equal. Staying at home all day with children is no easy task so don’t think any less of your partner for not getting out to work. If you are both working, make sure you take over some of the household tasks and children’s duties. If you are both working, you are both equals and that should be the view across all aspects of life. Speak to your partner and see how you can split the household tasks to make it equal and to help them out.
Supporting your family is something all men should be doing. Whether it’s playing with your children or cooking dinner, these are all important aspects to be implementing at home. Your partner will love the extra help and your children will feel so happy and loved having some extra attention from their father. All these aspects will really help to bridge the gap in society and allow more women to work and balance their home life.
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