6 Actions That You’ll Need To Get Beyond the Infatuation Stage

I want you to imagine if you were with someone and you actually grew together and didn’t grow apart. Wouldn’t that be nice? We hear that overused excuse for breaking up (Fell out of love, grew apart) so much that it would be nice if people would just be honest. You became bored and stop tending to and watering your garden. You have to continually invest in each other after the newness is over or you won’t make it. So many relationships I’ve seen have a copy and paste template of the inevitable. It’s like watching the same movie over and over again. I’ve had multiple relationships that felt like a parking meter. We both put in change one time and the time expires. When a person is really for you it feels you both have reserved parking spots with your name and title on a sign/painted on the ground. It’s a union that you believe in and will fight for. There are some important ingredients that I believe that goes into a thriving union between two people. They’ll add to a recipe that will get you level to level and beyond the honeymoon stage.

1.) Laughter

I can’t think of something that is more healing to the soul and body more that two human beings sharing a good belling aching laugh together. It’s so beautiful to let your guards down and be goofy and silly together. You’re no longer taking yourselves seriously to impress each other you’re just having fun, letting your hair down and being vulnerable. It’s not forced either. It’s organic. When you’re comfortable with someone you actually get their authentic nerdy laugh. You know the one that comes along with a snort? No one would dare unleash that weirdness on a first date. Having a sense of humor and laughing releases endorphins and a couple can experience joy, love and euphoria all in one.

2.) Mutual respect
When you respect your partner your standards and how you treat them are very high. No you shouldn’t worship and make them a god but I believe you should have reverence for the person that you plan to spend your life with. You should consider their feelings and treat them how you would want to be treated. Respect and trust go hand and hand because when I respect you I trust that you’ll keep my best interest in mind . It’s us against the world because we’re a united front. Honor is the foundation that we can build our skyscrapers and city of love upon.

3.) Stimulating conversation

Conversion can elevate and enhance a relationship. Just imagine being present with each other discussing topics that will inspire, encourage, challenge and help each other to grow. I know we’ve all heard of that popular term communication is the key. The key to what? Many don’t even know how to communicate because when they converse with someone they’re just thinking about a response instead of actually listening. A stimulating conversation is like making love or making beautiful music together. Instead of physical it’s a spiritual and mental connection that you tap into. It’s a higher frequency that takes your relationship to a new level. Talking to each other is planting seeds into each other that’ll promote an abundant life of fruit falling off of the trees. Get into the rhythm of verbal and non verbal communication and you’ll go far beyond the early stages of your relationship.

4) Support and being each other’s biggest fan

Support is something that most lack and take for granted so when you do experience it it’s beyond euphoric. It’s one of the most joyful feelings in this world for someone to take time to acknowledge the things that you’re passionate about. I know the validation can be addictive but when it’s based in true love you won’t crave it from other places. I told the love of my life how much my writing craft means to me and now it’s not a article that goes by that I don’t see and feel her presence. Why is it that we have to venture outside of our relationships or marriage to get our dreams and passion supported? If you have to go outside of you two to receive this well you may be with the wrong person my friend. Be honest with yourself.

5.) It’s the little things

You have to appreciate every moment. Nothing is too trivial and don’t ever take your partner for granted. I don’t care how many times you say I love you in a day. Do it. Don’t fall into the laziness of assuming your partner knows how much you love them. No. Say it! Verbally! Back it with action too. Give that random hug and kiss. Compliment them and tell them how much you appreciate them. Go out of your way and put some effort into it. Write love notes to each whether it’s email or the ancient act of handwriting. It counts. It matters. It warms the heart. It’s endearing. Take a walk in the rain together. Take a walk in the snow together. Have a movie night where you pop popcorn and eat snacks. Discuss your hopes and vision with each other. Create a physical photo album of photos not seen on social media. It’ll be something sacred just for you. Eat off each other’s plate. Prioritize you both going on a date because life can be so serious so just have fun with each other. Every second together is a blessing so you have to treat each other like it is. Your relationship is an adventure so enjoy every bit of the road trip.

6.) Genuine love

How do you know that you have genuine love? I tell you one thing if you don’t have it you probably won’t make pass the honeymoon stage. Genuine love is resilience, patience consistence. being considerate, being trustworthy and honest. You value that person like you value yourself so you treat them how you would like to be treated. This is the kind of love that you can get in the biggest argument with them and you still can’t see yourself without them. It’s worth getting out of yourself and compromising. When genuine love comes knocking it’s not going to feel like anything else you’ve ever felt or have previously experienced. It goes much deeper than the surface. When we meet someone that we’re attracted to we all think we’re falling in love. Love at first sight. That person is perfect until you get introduced to the real flawed person. The one that will be your partner though all of the peaks and valleys of life will love your imperfections and you’ll adore theirs. You’re both actively creating the life you want together as you go. It doesn’t create itself. When you can’t explain or define how much you love someone and you both feel it your soul that’s a great sign. This is someone you believe with all of your being that you could take the world on with. You are self love and a reflection of it to each other. In stillness, calm and your peace your soulmate meets you there. When your secret place has room for two that’s when you know you have something sacred and special. The infatuation stage being over shouldn’t be a bleak end but the start of a beautiful new beginning.

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This post was previously published on Hello, Love.

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