This choice largely relies on the specifics of your social media account and the context of the posted remarks. In other words, are you a stay-at-home parent pondering how to handle that jealous friend who keeps criticizing you on Instagram, or are you the social media representative for a large company choosing how to handle customer complaints on Facebook?
Depending on your circumstances and the identity of the person posting critical remarks on your social media page, the stakes will be very different. This generally implies that each statement must be taken into account individually. People frequently neglect that there is an honest individual on the other end of a social media account in the world we currently live in. This is particularly true if you are just an ordinary, everyday person using social media.
When to Address Negative Comments
When should you honestly respond to criticism rather than decide to ignore it?
It would help if you decided this on a case-by-case basis. Even though you might hear this as common counsel, it’s essential to remember that making a general choice to ignore or delete negative remarks is not always the best course of action.
While it’s true that if you are being bullied, harassed, threatened, or otherwise insulted on the Internet, blocking and deleting should be your course of action, there are a lot of grayer areas of negative comments that might benefit from a bit of interaction on your part. Let’s take a look at those.
— People Are Watching
In a situation where people are watching how you react to negative comments, consider engaging instead of simply ignoring or deleting them. This could mean that you are running a business, acting as a social media manager for a business, or you are an employee in the public eye for a company. It could also mean that you are a role model on the Internet, whether on a large scale (to the public) or a small scale (to your children).
— When Responding Allows You to Engage
The key to operating a successful company is engagement. Because of this, as long as you manage it properly, there is no negative press.
In the private realm, a critical remark made by a cousin on a personal post you share could serve as a starting point for you to find out more about them and their views. You might pass up the opportunity for development in these situations if your automatic response is to disregard or delete.
— When You Need to Apologize
If there is some appropriate apology, it is best not to ignore or delete a comment. For example, in the case of a disgruntled customer, a business should not pretend that a comment was not made about their product.
In the case of a personal social media page, if someone leaves a comment about something you’ve done that you owe an apology for, it will be best to deal with it in some manner. At the same time, it’s important not to make false promises. Be realistic in what you can offer regarding apology or restitution. We’ll discuss this in the section on how to respond.
— When Not Responding Looks Like You Are Hiding Something
You may have something to conceal if someone makes a critical remark on your social media account and you ignore or delete it. It’s completely acceptable to choose this course of action if you have nothing to conceal to avoid dealing with criticism on your page.
However, if the remark contains even a glimpse of truth, it might appear that you are trying to prevent a conflict. It might be best to participate in a reaction if you feel that if you don’t, people will wonder if you’re concealing something.
— To Protect Your Reputation
It would help if you reacted to unfavorable social media remarks in other circumstances, such as when you need to correct something, explain something, or defend your image. It is entirely normal to want to present evidence to prove that something someone said about you was fake if it was untrue or unfair.
When to Ignore Criticism
— Things You Don’t Want on Your Page
Another situation in which you will not want to engage or respond is if the commenter is putting things on your social media page that you don’t want to be there. That might include profanity, spam, random attacks that don’t make sense, aggression, cultural slurs, racial bias, harassment, threats, etc. In this case, you have the right and should exercise the right to delete anything that you feel should not be on your social media page.
In these situations, you should probably also prohibit and prevent the offender from posting further on your account. Generally speaking, most social media sites make it reasonably simple to do this. While they might still be able to see their remarks and their friends might be able to, comments won’t be visible to new visitors to your website.
— When You Expect Others to Have Your Back
If you don’t feel up to engaging with the negative comments and expect others to come to your defense, it may be wise to wait a bit for your community to respond on your behalf. This will be less true for a business but might be appropriate for a personal or influencer account.
— Trolls and Bullies
Troll comments should also be ignored or deleted because the only goal of a troll is to get you to respond to negative comments. Trolls like to comment on things on social media pages to elicit an emotional reaction from the victim. They revel in being able to get you “riled up,” The only cure to stop them from commenting is to ignore them altogether.
How to React to Critical Comments
— Be Positive
No matter how unfavorable the remark about you is, it’s best to start by responding positively. This demonstrates your concern for everyone on your social media profile. Avoid being aggressive or combative, and maintain your composure. If you don’t, you’ll come off as losing your calm and less trustworthy. It might not be easy to keep your cool. But remember that comments are rarely directed at you and are typically more about the individual saying them.
— Be Polite
Along with being optimistic, you should also maintain good manners. Keep a good profile and avoid turmoil. Do not become agitated or lose your composure in the face of an aggressive assault. This is crucial if you use social media for work or if your account is a company employee and is accessible to the general public. Even though it may be difficult, being courteous to someone disparaging you or your company will give you the upper hand over the spiteful person.
— Request a Private Message From Them
Following that, there are some situations where you’ll want to take the discussion away from the spotlight and into a private setting. This is frequently the best option unless their negative remark can be swiftly resolved in the comment area.
Don’t, however, write them a note. Instead, urge them to contact you so you can talk privately in a remark you leave for them. By doing this, you can demonstrate to everyone that you are ready to handle the problem without having to discuss it publicly.
— Have a Cautious Public Conversation
In cases where the negative comment can be quickly addressed in the comment section, consider having a cautious conversation with them there. For example, if someone commented that they did not like your Elf on the Shelf display and thought it must have taken up much wasted time, you could reply, “Thanks for the feedback! The kids enjoy it, and it’s helping to bring some magic to our Christmas.”
— Requesting the Removal of Their Comment
Consider asking them to take down the comment if you had a private or public discussion with them and believe their post is damaging your image.
— Respond Quickly
If you choose to respond, it’s better to do it earlier than later unless you are waiting for your community of friends to respond. This shows that you are not ignoring the problem or trying to evade the issue.
— Be Funny
Add humor to your response if you believe the circumstance calls for it. If you’re unsure, it’s best to maintain a somber demeanor because it is less likely to be misinterpreted. Comedy can serve as a “clap back” that demonstrates your sense of humor and lack of seriousness in the face of adversity. It has the same impact as being kind or encouraging but also gives you an advantage.
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This article was co-written with a therapist from Sensera — a self-help app that provides daily CBT audio sessions and exercises. The app helps people deal with a variety of mental issues (anxiety, low self-esteem, and relationship problems). Download now to become happier!
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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You may also like these posts on The Good Men Project:
White Fragility: Talking to White People About Racism | Escape the “Act Like a Man” Box | The Lack of Gentle Platonic Touch in Men’s Lives is a Killer | What We Talk About When We Talk About Men |
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Photo credit: Chad Madden on Unsplash