I use a service called Bark to monitor what my daughter is watching and searching on her devices but because of the privacy policies on Android phones I still need to actually scroll through her messages to look for anything potentially alarming, either by her or one of her friends. It’s an intrusion into her privacy that I know won’t be tolerated forever but for now she accepts that this is a condition of the privilege. I don’t know how many of her friend’s parents also do this but there are at least a few that I am aware of and I plan to continue it for as long as she will let me and possibly a bit longer than that.
I try not to be too invasive, mainly just skimming through. There have been a few times when I’ve had her apologize for excessive rudeness during disagreements but for the most part there hasn’t been much of interest.
Until this:
Excuse me?
I don’t know this woman and don’t want to make assumptions. To be fair, I don’t even know for sure that it is really the mother and not a confused eleven year old. I don’t know what else might have been deleted between the kids or with this supposed adult that I might not have seen. I’ve only met this girl a few times but she seems pretty weird, which is fine because we are also pretty weird and in this house that isn’t considered a bad thing.
The problem is that not every house is like this one. If that sounds arrogant, so be it. I live in a very conservative town and I’m no longer surprised by the ignorance of some of it’s residents. There is a trendy phrase that is currently popular among the anti-LGBTQ crowd called “rapid onset gender dysphoria.” It’s the belief that exposure to drag queens, queer pop culture and “groomers” can convince a person to transition their identity without due diligence and ultimate regret. I guess the thought is that being gay or trans is basically a communicable disease. Ironically the people that think this also seem to overwhelmingly believe COVID is a hoax.
There’s a lot I don’t know here, which is why I haven’t knocked on this person’s door. Whether or not there is a grown adult that’s being an asshole to my kid because she has short hair, rainbow buttons and very vocal beliefs about equality it’s extremely easy for me to make that assumption.
And that kind of sucks.
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Previously Published on Thirsty Daddy and is republished on Medium.
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