A Woman’s Desire Doesn’t Stem From Your Looks, but From These Three Places

It’s insane how much single men stress over their appearance.

The internet is rife with doomers who insist that looks are all that matter when it comes to attracting women. Online sub-communities such as ‘incels’ and ‘Black Pill’ teach men that it’s “over” if they’re not tall, strong and handsome.

There was a time I believed that too. Back when I went a whole year without landing a date, I figured it was because I was too ugly.

Then, I discovered the men’s dating advice community. It taught me that seduction is a skill that any man can learn and improve. After following the advice provided to improve my social skills, I noticed women reacting differently.

Soon enough, it became clear they didn’t care about my bald head, crooked teeth and crow’s feet. Not nearly as much as they care about these three things…

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1. How Do You Make Women Feel?

Men are incredibly visual when it comes to attraction. We’re nearly all drawn to a youthful face, big boobs, full lips, wide hips and a small waist.

Biologically, these are the signs that a woman can birth healthy children. Our desire is typically very simple and logical. We spot a woman with these signs of physical beauty and we want her.

But a woman’s desire is far more complex and emotional. They’re more prone to make decisions based on how they feel. If you’re a man who can provide fun and excitement to her life, she’ll quickly become obsessed with you. This emotional rollercoaster is what younger women especially chase more than anything else.

It’s in a woman’s nature to respond to emotions. A young woman chases ‘players’ not for their looks, but their ability to push her emotional buttons. A player knows how to create the rollercoaster of ups and downs that all women crave in their romances. We call this ‘good game’.

If you can learn to do the same, you can attract amazing women into your life, no matter what you look like.

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2. Is There An Emotional Connection?

Men will spot a hottie at the bar and desire her immediately. It doesn’t matter that they don’t know a thing about her. This is far less common with women. They need to feel an emotional connection before they get turned on.

This is partly due to their feminine nature, which makes them more emotional. But they also need to be more careful about who they have sex with. Otherwise, they could end up with someone creepy, dangerous or a guy who doesn’t give a crap about her.

Biologically, women do seek out men with good genetics to provide healthy children. That’s why they might make eyes at the tall, handsome guy. But they’re most concerned about finding a man who wants to protect her family and provide for them.

Your masculine traits will prove you’re capable of doing that. But you’ll need to build an emotional connection to show you want to do it. This involves proving you want more than her body.

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3. Does She See A Bright Future With You?

If a woman becomes romantically involved with you, will her life become objectively better? This is a question that all women will ask themselves.

Women want you to have a lifestyle that excites them. That’ll ensure their emotional rollercoaster lasts forever.

This is why rich guys have an easier time attracting women. But also musicians, club promoters and DJs too. When you have status in a certain niche, women will be drawn in when they want a piece of that for themselves.

Your future prospects cater to a woman’s desire for excitement and her desire to have her children looked after. It’s the most important factor to keep a woman in your life, and way more important than a pretty face.

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Two Out Of Three Will Get You A Long Way With Women

A man with these three qualities provides tangible benefits for a woman’s life. The same can’t be said of a guy with soft skin, dreamy eyes or a cool haircut.

As a man, your appearance is your first impression. It communicates a lot of things about you. How well can you take care of yourself? How much self-love do you have? How physically strong and disciplined are you? You should take care of your fashion and grooming for these reasons. You should build muscle at the gym for countless reasons.

But, if you’re serious about improving your dating life, your main focus should be improving in these three areas.

1. Learning ‘good game’.
2. Building strong emotional connections.
3. Creating an attractive lifestyle.

Even with two out of three, you’re likely to attract amazing women into your life.

I was attracting amazing women with good game and strong connections, while working an entry-level magazine job in London. Players can woo women with good game and an attractive lifestyle, without even pretending to care too much about them. Non-charismatic nice guys can land a great girlfriend if they have the other two traits in abundance.

Get all three locked down — and you’re likely to have women fighting to be with you.

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My articles teach young men how to escape their comfort zones, improve their mental health and make better dating decisions. Follow me on Medium for more useful advice.

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This post was previously published on medium.com.

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