What is “toxic masculinity” and who is it really hurting?
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When some people hear the term toxic masculinity they assume that it is putting down men and individuals who identify as men, by calling them toxic. However, the term actually refers to the way in which the social expectations of masculinity and what it means to be a man are toxic to men’s mental health and wellbeing.
Do you want to be part of creating a kinder, more inclusive society?
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Photo: YouTube/Claudia Boleyn
Powerful response, Antony. It is also a bit troubling as when I see a man like you begin to become so frustrated that he finally loses his patience and instead fires a broad-side, no matter how accurate and timely, that there is something much deeper, much more insidious that is affecting us here. I’ve read everything stated. There is a good deal of resentment, but not really identifying why this particular redefinition, or critique is seen as so offensive so I’ll attempt to explain why from my point of view. When I listen to the explanation of what “toxic masculinity”… Read more »
I want to address one more thing concerning the backlash the video got. There is a feminist saying “nothing about us without us”. They usually say that when they see men making decisions for women. Are the decisions necessarily bad? No, but there is a feeling that the actual people experiencing the issue would have insights into their particular problems. I don’t know how many men actually contributed to the bedrock of feminist thought (ie this idea of toxic masculinity). If they did maybe people would realize that WOMEN have expectations of masculinity as well and sometimes not the same… Read more »
A few things. We just had an article on female mathematicians and how if some people felt misogynistic math jokes were hurtful, that should be enough for people to stop telling them. So if many men by feminists own admission feel ostrisized or hurt or diminished by the term toxic masculinity, why isn’t that enough to stop using the word. Men should just man up and deal with it is not the right response. @ SlackRabbit @ 8ball It’s like any professional. There can be male OBGYNs or female urologists. They’ve studied it so they feel competent to speak on… Read more »
Using the phrase “toxic masculinity” in gender discussions is the same as using the phrase “white privilege” in race discussions– both are so obviously off-putting and so strongly provoke a backlash from the target groups. I’ve reached the (fairly obvious) conclusion from observation that people use these terms to gain cachet in their social-justice clique, not to make actual changes in the world.
@ Jonathan G
“I’ve reached the (fairly obvious) conclusion from observation that people use these terms to gain cachet in their social-justice clique”
I think it’s worse than that. It’s about creating an enemy that needs to be defeated in order to mobilize people. Like the Bush administration said, there are no good targets in Afghanistan, but there are many in Iraq. They want an enemy that is tangible so they blame men or masculinity (ie toxic femininity never appears in the lexicon).
So yet again, a women so entitled that she actually not only think she can talk about be masculine but even has the hubris to then go on YouTube and lecture men.
And the biggest irony is, by lecturing men on masculinity she actually emasculates here audience….or at least those stupid, cowardly and blue-pill enough that let their masculinity be defined by a women
Man am I sick of women who have zero experience being men feeling like they can tell men what masculinity is like.
StopFemsplaining2016
You are wasting your time, folks. Each time women obtain another privilege over men, the bar will be moved and women will demand more. The rad-fems do the heavy lifting and the vast majority of women sit silently and complicity – all the while collecting the blood money, privilege and unearned power the government and white knights force from men to women. This has been going on for decades and it will never stop. Why? Because the more men abandon relationships to protect themselves, the more government will redistribute wealth and power from men to women. How? In a myriad… Read more »
GREAT RESPONSE!!!!
When some people hear the term toxic masculinity they assume that it is putting down men and individuals who identify as men, by calling them toxic. However, the term actually refers to the way in which the social expectations of masculinity and what it means to be a man are toxic to men’s mental health and wellbeing. That’s not a complete picture of how the term is used. Think about this for a moment. When a guy thinks he has to have a lot of sex with a lot of women to prove he is a real man its called… Read more »
Two thumbs up Daniel
Today we are going to talk about toxic femininity. Now all you women need to understand, from this man, what femininity is and what’s toxic about it because, as a man, I know better than you. I understand that I am putting toxic and femininity together, but that’s not what it means. No really. It refers to the way in which we raise our women today, and how it hurts all of us. See, we raise girls to be frivolous and self-consumed, lacking any empathy for anything beyond themselves and their vanity, supporting the cosmetic industries, fashion industries rather than… Read more »
I liked what you said here DJ. What I’m about to say though, is not intended to insult GMP but the truth is that the solutions will not be found on this site or any feminist site for that matter. I appreciate what GMP does and tries to do but they have a feminist perspective on what and why they do what they do.
Hi, Tom. A great deal of that was more tongue in cheek than anything else, but a great deal of it was also serious as a heart attack. I have been doing this for so very long, seeing us not at square one, but going backwards, that there are times that I really have nothing left offer beyond a head-shake or a chuckle. I mean, we’ve already tried this back in the 70s and 80s during the “Allen Alda” years, yet we keep hammering away at the wrong wall. There are times when I want to just shake people. I’ve… Read more »
Well said DJ.
Personally I’m tired of women telling men …. “Toxic masculinity” = feminist move to try to take control of men, who they are, who they should be and what they should do these days. Some of what she stated appears to be remedial.
That being said, perhaps this would have been better served on a feminist women’s site.
I do so wish these “warriors” would actually get dropped into the front lines or a hot LZ.
PS AS A Gen X white male cis gen ( in the appropriate blathering clap trap) you are welcome to any privilege I have been granted from my gender, race, age or sexual identity: but do be sure to surrender your entitlements when you show up.
* Damn the Mayans for not bringing a good world ending catastrophe that would have poured bleach into the progressive liberal S.J.W. gene pool. “SOCIETY” NEEDS a double flush.