Long-distance relationships are often portrayed as doomed to fail in popular culture. However, whether such relationships succeed or falter ultimately depends on the individuals involved and their chosen approach. While geographic distance presents undeniable challenges, studies show that embracing these hurdles rather than viewing them as insurmountable can lead to unexpected rewards.
All relationships require effort to maintain, and distance inherently introduces additional struggles. Partners may keenly feel the lack of simple, shared moments they once enjoyed. For example, casual errands together on the weekends, and quiet evenings cooking at home side by side. Feelings of anxiety, loneliness, and resentment are common in the face of distance and a relationship. However, research suggests that how partners think about and respond to the challenges of distance is within their control. Rather than dwelling on what they cannot have, couples can work to refocus on what remains available to them, such as communicating more often, visiting when possible, and making the most of the time they do have together.
Couples in long-distance relationships highlight the importance of establishing rituals to stay close emotionally. Some small but meaningful actions like scheduling regular video calls, sending letters or small gifts, sharing details of one’s life over daily messages, or planning some “creative” dates like cooking meals together over video chat.
Besides, don’t forget to find any possibility of a visit! Using that visit to focus on meaningful connection rather than constant activity. Setting aside ample time simply to be in one another’s presence helps strengthen the relationship. While distance may make physical togetherness difficult to obtain, deliberate effort and open communication can help sustain closeness, trust, and romance even from apart.
Some couples who succeed in long-distance relationships commit to seeing each other in person at a minimum every few months. Besides that, others plan ahead for bigger milestones they can share together, such as Christmas holidays, birthdays, and of course anniversaries! Not just those big occasions but even small gestures like sending a card to say “I’m thinking of you” can definitely help bridge the distance.
Taking an interest in one another’s separate lives by listening closely, asking questions, and being genuinely curious about personal growth shows ongoing care and support. Recognizing that temporary separation allows for independence and trust is important. After that, reuniting gives way to an even richer experience of choosing to be together!
The distance can also present an opportunity for individuals to nurture independence and self-fulfillment separate from the relationship. It benefits both personal well-being and the relationship. This allows partners to feel more confident and complete within themselves, which benefits both individual well-being and the relationship. When reunited after time apart, this independent fulfillment gives way to an even richer experience of choosing each other. The ability to blend intimacy with personal freedom is an unforeseen reward of navigating long-distance challenges!
Every relationship is unique, there is no one formula for surviving or thriving in spite of the distance. However, the role of mindset and effort in long-distance relationship success suggests that distance itself does not destroy relationships. Rather, how partners think about and respond to the difficulties distance brings is key to transcending the belief that such relationships are doomed to fail.
While distance is unlikely to ever be easy, it is an opportunity to deepen appreciation for one another, strengthen communication, and nurture individual growth. Whether and how that work translates to relationship success in the long term is ultimately up to the individuals involved!
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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