TASK #44: ED-I-KET
“Good breeding consists of concealing how much we think of ourselves and how little we think of the other person.” Mark Twain
This happened to me recently…
I’m walking down the street, I spot a 7-11 and being in desperate need of a dog and a big gulp, I head for the door. A woman, a PREGNANT WOMAN, opens the door for me! I thank her and go inside.
I can’t think about anything else all day. How polite was that? I came to the conclusion that etiquette defines our character–it makes us HUMAN! After all, What separates man from beast? Not much. Take your average ape. He walks around with his ass hanging out. Or dogs–they crap in the neighbor’s yard. Camels spit. Pigs don’t bathe and coyotes eat cats. I’ve done all of the above, except eat cat. So I ask you again: What’s the difference? I’ll tell you: a soul, a pair of jeans, and etiquette!
Gentleman, we have to practice good etiquette. Here are some rules:
–Dress appropriate to the occasion. Don’t wear a flannel to a wedding.
–Let people OFF the elevator before you try to push your way on.
–Shake hands like a man. No dead fish, no crushing clutch, just firm and purposeful.
–Be on time. Always.
–Do you have roommates? Don’t eat their food or drink their liquor.
–Wash your hands after you use the bathroom.
AT SOMEONE’S HOME
–Chew with your mouth closed.
–Say please, thank you and excuse me.
–Don’t hog the food.
–Play fair. Don’t cheat. Even if you can…
–Lose with dignity, and win with dignity. Just last week, after Ohio State thumped Michigan, a co-worker, U of M ’93, walks into the office grimacing, ready to receive my complete repertoire of shaming and humiliation, but all I said was “good game, maybe you’ll get us next year…”, which won’t happen, but I said it and I felt better for it.
AT THE GYM
–Rack your weights.
–Wipe down the equipment. Don’t be that guy…
–Never say something on-line that you wouldn’t say to a person’s face.
–Don’t have sex with a friend’s wife, girlfriend and or ex.
–Put down the toilet seat.
–Hold open the car door for your woman.
I can’t write down every rule. For inspiration, you can try these rules from rd.com.
Read them and follow them for a week.