Four Really Disastrous Problems With Modern Dating

Relationships have become even more difficult these days.

In fact, I’ve seen quite a few articles, even on Medium, proclaiming how women and men are giving up on dating.

By the end of those pieces, it was evident to me how difficult dating, love, and relationships have become today.

Hence, I’ve compiled this list of four disastrous problems with modern dating. This knowledge might help ease cultivating solid relationships amidst the difficulty of modern relationships.

1. Partner and relationship objectification

Much of the problem with modern relationships arises from what the media feeds us.

Thanks to the objectifying media content on Instagram and every other media outlet,

We’ve somehow evolved into a generation of people that (especially men, ahem, sorry, guys) objectify and view women as sexual objects rather than fully integrated human beings.

People now objectify their partners, potential partners, and even relationships for work, status, influence, you name it.

Hence, dating and relationships are becoming increasingly difficult, and objectification worsens things.

Because according to studies, all this objectification does is hinder one from developing a more personal and emotional connection with a romantic partner.

So the more one dehumanizes and objectifies a romantic partner or love interest, the less satisfied they will be in the relationship. Or the more difficult it’ll be for them to land a romantic partner in the first place.

And I believe this is because objectifying and putting a love interest, partner, or relationship on a ridiculous pedestal will make it easy for one to slide into a clingy, desperate, insecure, and anxious state.

As a result, such a person will always appear unattractive to potential partners. Or end up putting up behaviors that’ll, in one way or another, make their relationship anything but a happy, satisfying, and functional one.

2. The never-ending prevalence of sexism and gender stereotyping

Sexism and gender stereotyping were far more prevalent in previous generations than in this age. Yet, they’re still wreaking havoc in modern relationships.

All the hostile sexism that isn’t only directed toward female leaders, female politicians, or feminists but is also prevalent in romantic heterosexual relationships — is among the sole reasons for verbal and physical aggression that’s still plaguing today’s relationships.

And that’s because men with sexist beliefs are somewhat insecure, emotionally unintelligent people who would cowardly project their anger and insecurities onto women rather than deal with their emotional issues.

Of course, women also aren’t innocent of damaging stereotypes about men that create distrust, hurt feelings, and make relationships just as difficult.

Life will be much easier if fewer men view women as inferior or if stereotypes like “men are just after sex” don’t exist.

3. The manipulation techniques used in modern relationships

Previous generations never had the technological advancements we have today.

But with these technological advancements that are supposed to make meeting people and interpersonal relationships easier came the replacement of direct interactions with gimmicks and games.

A development that often leaves a lot of us in a whirlwind of anxiety and uncertainty.

And for the perpetrators of these evil deeds, the quest to find a partner is nowhere near a search for love but a search for a victim to manipulate, control, hurt, and inflict pain on.

With these terrible partners or potential partners, you’re at the mercy of manipulation techniques such as gaslighting, bread-crumbing, benching, and roaching—the list is endless.

You can only get the upper hand if you’re well aware of these manipulation techniques and even know how to spot and avoid them; otherwise, you’ll become a victim.

4. Shallow and superficial connections are now the new normal

People of this generation are hard-core worshippers of “classic distractions,” as Mark Manson calls them.

If you have a good sense of humor and can enjoy yourself while teasing and bantering with a love interest or partner, you’ll earn yourself the status of “fun to be with.”

The problem is that this approach or whatever breeds shallow, superficial connections and nothing else.

Because if this is a thing for you, you’ll always communicate without saying anything meaningful, enjoy yourself (with someone) without doing anything, and feel like you know someone when you REALLY don’t.

Making this another huge limitation of modern relationships. Hence, the need to focus on building deeper bonds and relationships.

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This post was previously published on medium.com.

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