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Men get bullied, too! For years, many people seldom heard about men getting harassed in the workplace. It’s more common than you know. For the past five years, men started coming to me for guidance on how to deal with a female bully. These were kind-hearted, intelligent, and great employees who wanted to get along with everyone in the workplace.
Men may have been conditioned to think that women are the weaker sex, but studies show that women can be vicious and bullies in the workplace. According to Dr. Michelle, 40% of workplace bullies are women, and female bullies pick on other women more than 70% of the time. Men get their share of bullying from women.
Here are five strategies for you to employ if a mean female is harassing you in your workplace.
First, bullying in the workplace is not illegal.
However, you can report unlawful discrimination to a supervisor, HR or even the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC). Bullying and discrimination often go hand-in-hand when a female bully picks her target. Become your own expert and check out the EEOC’s discrimination types. It’s essential to understand discrimination qualifying factors per the EEOC.
You may find some solutions in an earlier article I wrote for The Good Men Project.
Second, but hold on… go to HR for help?
Yes—always get HR involved because you want to show proof that you went for help with someone in your HR department. It boils down to creating a trail of evidence that you went for help with your matter.
People put so much emphasis on the fact that they may not trust their HR department or that nothing ever gets resolved. Still, go to HR and comprehend the importance of taking this action.
Third, you must realize that there is nothing weak or unmanly about asking for support.
It’s not reasonable or fair to tell a bullied man to “toughen” up. According to the National Alliance on Mental Health, Approximately 1 in 5 adults in the U.S.—43.8 million, or 18.5%—experiences mental illness in a given year.
Seeking mental health care may be necessary if you are becoming consumed with anxiety, depression and other mental diagnoses. Only a qualified clinician can diagnose you. While you may not want to get on pharmaceutical medicine, it may support you till you can manage and master your emotions. There is nothing weak about helping yourself. It’s a courageous action on your part.
Fourth, it’s never your fault when another person mistreats you.
It’s never acceptable for one person to abuse another person. While the bully may have personal issues and is projecting their anger or hurt on you, it’s perfectly fine to hold them accountable for behavior that is harmful to you and others. Don’t let a bully destroy you or your sanity. You always have choices in your life.
Fifth, do your best to be positive in your workplace.
It will make you happier and those around you. Always have an exit strategy in place. You can put money away in case you need to leave a toxic job or boss.
Leaving an unfulfilled, unhealthy and poisonous work culture is liberating. You feel better when you don’t get that grouchy feeling the day before you have to go back to your job. Yes—it takes guts to leave a job that is comfortable, even if it’s full of venomous female bullies. You can reach out for assistance to become an entrepreneur. Ask for help.
Letting a bully continuously harm you eats at your soul. Is it worth it to stay in work environment where you are not treated with respect? Say “yes” to making liberating and empowering decisions to support yourself. You can read more of my articles about workplace bullying and discrimination here.
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